Theory in Practice: A Pink Polo Production

365 Days

2010-01-20T01:51:00.000-05:00

I have not been this angry about politics in quite a long time, it seems. To think, 365 days ago, I fell asleep on a couch in Washington, DC knowing that the next morning, I would bear witness to a seminal moment in human history, the inauguration of America's first black President, and the first - we thought - truly transformational leader of our time, Barack Obama.

I remember making haste to the West Lawn of the Capitol, desperately pushing my way through the thousands, and with tears in my eyes, listened and cheered one more time at the victory I helped create - not for me, but for my country, for my fellow citizens. Not an electoral victory, or a political victory, but a human victory, as I and the millions gathered at the Capitol on that cold January morning truly believed that we were on the precipice of a new American epoch, of peace and brotherhood, of teamwork and solidarity, of a renewal of the founding principles of this nation. We had come from the four corners and the nation and around the world, and we believed on that day the work truly began, that the hope was alive and well, that our dreams were coming true.

Now, one year later, our dreams lie in shambles, hijacked by the poisonous efforts of a small minority of very boisterous charlatans. Tonight, in Massachusetts, the place in this nation set forth from its creation as a Shining City on a Hill, the place where leaders are born and call home, the place which has given more good to this nation than anywhere else, tonight, in Massachusetts, the American dream is a dream denied. The people of the Commonwealth of Massachusetts have elected Scott Brown as their next United States Senator. He will take the same seat in the United States Senate as men like Adams, Webster, Lodge and Kennedy. A state senator from Wrentham will carry the legacy of these great men, a legacy to which he has avowed not only to deny justice but to do harm. And in so doing, Scott Brown will put the final nail in the coffin of hopes of those who spearheaded the movement for equitable access to health care as a fundamental right of citizenry in America, indeed the cause of his predecessor's, Edward Moore Kennedy, life. He will provide the necessary vote against any progress the country would wished to have made throughout the coming year. Tonight, progress became a victim of its own success, torn asunder by those few who seek to benefit from the misery of the many.

And so tonight, there are only words plain and clear for the actions of the people of the Commonwealth. Know that these truths are what you have done by your hand, Massachusetts. And that America is weaker for it.

Because of what you have done, Massachusetts, innocent people in this country will die, victims of a broken health care system built for the powerful and not the people. And their blood shall rest on your hands.

Because of what you have done, Massachusetts, our country is now set on an unwavering path towards inequity, injustice and strife.

Because of what you have done, Massachusetts, fringe beliefs held by a small minority of ignorant people will now be given credence, broadcast for all the world to mock as the "true character of America."

Because of what you have done, Massachusetts, our daughters, sisters, and mothers will wake up tomorrow second class citizens in the land they helped to build and help to lead.

Because of what you have done, Massachusetts, the hope of millions of young gay Americans to serve their country or simply live a life of freedom has been deferred yet again.

Because of what you have done, Massachusetts, we are once again faced with the certainty that the ever deepening divisions in our own society are the paramount markers of that society, rich from poor, black from white, gay from straight, men from women, entitled from those in need.

Because of what you have done, Massachusetts, a nation founded on the intrinsic human values of liberty, service and brotherhood has once and most likely for all lain waste to every one of its ideals for the sake of those divisions.

But, most importantly, because of what you have done, Massachusetts, tonight, you increased the chances that the baby crying out in hunger in the night is your brother, that the girl raped and left to die in an emergency room without quality and appropriate care is your sister, that the gay man beaten for being different is your son, that the immigrant rounded up in the night and sent a land not his own is your friend, that the person without work, left to freeze on a cold New England night without food or shelter, is you.

Here, They Kill By The Handful

2009-03-02T11:29:00.002-05:00

NOTE: I wrote this piece last Friday evening, after watching the Current documentary for the first time. In the few days that have passed since then, both the New York Times and 60 Minutes have shed light on the growing Mexican crisis, as well as being mentioned in David Gregory's wide-ranging interview with Defense Secretary Robert Gates on Meet The Press, and in several other mainstream news outlets. Thus, while it may now be a story people are finally reporting, I'm only too glad to add my voice to the chorus, and ask you all to take a closer look at the world on our Southern Border.

In November 2008, fresh off my triumph as a staffer with the Indiana campaign for now-President Obama, I made my way back across the country, seeing the USA in my...well, Toyota Corolla (sorry, GM) and making some interesting pitstops along the way. One night, it was a Monday as I recall, I laid my weary head to rest in El Paso, Texas, along the Rio Grande and the US border with Mexico. It wasn't much of a town, I arrived after dark, having driven from Dallas that day - all day - and didn't get to see much, other than getting turned around off the freeway and nearly making for Juarez, the Mexican city just over the river.

That night, after a fast food dinner in my moderately priced airport hotel room, I threw on the local news. They began with the local news in El Paso, which was inconsequential at best, I seem to remember some kind of bond issue, and maybe some controversy at UTEP, the local college.

Then, the newscasters began the news stories from Juarez, three miles away from my hotel. The fourth and fifth stories that night are ones I'll never forget. First, they had B-roll footage of what looked like a staged scene from a drug movie, like Traffic or something of that ilk. They proceeded to discuss the seven "executions" - they don't go through the pretense of calling them murders, sensing premeditation, or killings, intimating there had been some sense of targeting - that had happened that afternoon, in full view of police, on one of the main streets in the city. I looked up from the newspaper or magazine or whatever it was I was reading with the TV blaring in the background, jaw agape, to learn the details. A police officer had been killed in cold blood, and then, just for good measure, bystanders were shot with assault rifles. They joined the more than six thousand executions in 2008 alone, becoming almost faceless, nameless victims to the internecine battle that is gripping Mexico. The next story detailed a warning for young women of the Borderland, as three women had been kidnapped, again, in broad daylight. They were now among the hundreds who had been taken in the last year, most of whom end up raped, or worse, or sold into slavery or - if they were truly lucky - ransomed to fund the Mexican drug cartels and their all out assault on the world drug market.

These stories were treated as de rigeur by the media. Ho hum, another spate of killings, some more young women kidnapped, just another day in Juarez. And it wasn't that the anchors were trivializing the stories either, it's that they had become all to familiar. This was an ordinary day.

Laura Ling and Current TV recently traveled to Juarez, and other cities throughout Mexico to shine a light on this story. It is a battle of epic proportions, one that threatens to turn America's neighbor to South and one of our largest trading partners into a failed state within the next year. And it is a battle that the American press refuses - either wilfully or, more likely, blindly - to cover. Their full hour documentary is below, and I encourage you all to watch it. It is a gripping hour which should open all of our eyes to the crisis just miles away from our Southern border.

One scene in particular struck me. Laura and her crew travel to Culiacan in Sinaloa state, one of the centers of the drug cartels in Central Mexico, where they grow and distribute marijuana and cocaine. They follow a police brigade to the scene of a fresh killing, one man was dead at the hands of the cartel. And with the sun shining down, and the blood still wet on the ground beneath their feet, the officer Laura interviews says, "At least it's only one person, that's lucky. Here, they kill by the handful."

The cartels kill at will, without fear of retribution. How long until this war spills over the border? How long until these drug lords see fit to kill and rape in the streets of San Antonio? Phoenix? Atlanta? New York? Chicago?

The time has come to shine a light on people who murder at will. The time has come to reevaluate how we fight a "war on drugs" and start targeting murderers and rapists and torturers and work at the source instead of targeting users.

If nothing else, Lara Ling and her team show us that until people in power target these cartels, they will continue to operate at will. President Calderon of Mexico has done well and taken key steps to begin stemming the violence, but it may be time to bring international pressure to bear against the cartels. If nothing else, people must begin to expose this issue and bring it into the light of day, so that "executions" and kidnappings are treated like the crimes they are, not footnotes in the daily news.

Give Me A Lever: John Kitzhaber for HHS Secretary

2009-02-04T15:13:00.000-05:00

I got a text message yesterday morning from a friend of mine who is as much a political junkie as I am. It said, simply, "We lost Daschle."

My heart sank. The red-bespectacled wonder had won redemption, something that comes along far too few times in American politics, only to piss it away over a car, a driver and one, admittedly galactically stupid, tax error. Daschle is one of the nation's thought leaders on health care and how to fix our broken system. In fact, he may be THE thought leader on the subject. He basically singlehandedly wrote the new President's health care policy during the campaign. If you ask people high up in the administration, they will tell you when the time came to select a health czar, the President had his man in Daschle.

Of course, he was so busy figuring out how to fix health care, he kinda sorta forgot to pay his taxes. A lot of them.

Oops.

The truth is, Daschle could have weathered the storm, but - and I actually believe this when I say it - Daschle so intimately knew the fight he and the President were going to have to wage on fixing our health care system that any distraction - a la the HillaryCare debacle in 1993 - would give the entrenched interests an opportunity to distract, delay and defuse the forces of Good and defeat any bill that would move us to a progressive health system.

We need real movement on this issue and we need it today. No distractions, no sideshows, no BS. People die every day because of lack of access to health care in this country, which is a fact that drives straight through cruelty before arriving at being a sin, a stain on all of us.

So, with this early setback, where do we go from here? Why not try the Pacific Northwest?

Allow me to introduce you to Governor John Kitzhaber. I am lucky enough to have a friend and political mentor in Joe Trippi, my former boss on the Dean campaign. To Joe's credit, he has been out in front on Twitter since the Daschle retraction went down yesterday, introducing his legions of followers to the work Kitzhaber's Archimedes Project has been doing. And as I've read more about Kitzhaber, himself a medical doctor, and his project, I have been thoroughly impressed with his chops.

The Archimedes Project has been working since 2006 under three key notions on how to reshape the health care debate in this country. Instead of working to fix medicare or other barely functional existing institutions, we must ask ourselves a simple question: What would the optimal system look like that could improve population health, reduce per capita cost and improve the patient's experience regardless of their category, how care is financed, a person's age, income, race or gender? It is a more holistic look back at where we've been with health care, where we've succeeded, more notably where we have failed, and, most importantly a look forward to what American inginuity on this idea can bring us.

Kitzhaber understands, as well, that change like this does not come swiftly, but rather with the steady drumbeat of leadership and forward thinking coupled with legislative initiatives to back it up. And, more importantly, the Project understands that being a thought leader on such an important topic is great, but without the support of the grassroots, the people who will benefit directly from these ideas, the Project won't go anywhere.

John Kitzhaber is a perfect intermediary to work between the President and the Congress and the People on this issue. He and the Archimedes Project leaders understand the need to work collectively on an issue that will mean greater prosperity for us all. And, though I haven't checked his tax returns as yet, Kitzhaber showed leadership as a two-term Governor in Oregon, expanding access to health care and building economic prosperity throughout the state. I encourage you to read more about and get involved with Kitzhaber's current work with the Archimedes Project at WeCanDoBetter.org, and join in the growing chorus of support, reminding President Obama that real change comes from the people, and that leadership on this issue means working across all boundaries to get the job done for the American people.

Coalition for Change: The Real Team of Rivals?

2008-12-02T02:23:00.001-05:00

Amidst the media-driven furore surrounding the rollout of Pres.-Elect Obama's cabinet, and the "One President at a Time" message that has become a press meme over the last weeks of economic consternation in this country, there is a real, no-foolin', honest-to-goodness street fight for the governmental leadership of a major Western power: Canada.

Yup, America's Hat decided that what's good for those of us below the 49th Parallel might make sense for them too.

You might remember (though no one would blame you if you didn't) that Canada held a federal election less than 45 days ago. That election, despite some close polling just days before the election spurred on by the horrendous economic news that hit in October, was won handily by the Conservative Party, and the incumbent Prime Minister, Stephen Harper. There has been, however, no honeymoon period for the new government. As you've no doubt seen from the news in this country, the economic news has gone from "Holy Crap" to "Stockbroker Suicide Watch" to its current state, "China's Redheaded Stepchild" in a matter of what seemed like hours. Leading the charge to ignominy has been the automotive industry, especially General Motors, which has very quietly become one of the most unfathomably awfully run companies in the history of modern economics. Adam Smith himself, were he to come back from the dead, would take a look at GM's books and "future plans" and quietly cry himself to sleep reading a copy of The General Theory of Employment, Interest and Money.

Would care to hazard a guess as to what one of Canada's largest employers is?

Anyone?

Yup. General Motors. Ford too, for that matter. Windsor, Ontario - just a Sarah Palin glance away from the rusting former automotive capital of Detroit - became a hub for car production over the last few decades thanks to Canada's national health care scheme, which helped (wait for it...wait for it) shave overhead costs while getting essentially the same quality of work.

Now, back to today's issues for our neighbours to the, uh, Nourth. As Pres.-Elect Obama has already begun tackling the severe economic crisis that he will face as President beginning the 20th of next January by touting his new team of advisers, promoting economic stimulus and infrastructural redevelopment across sectors, so too has Mr. Harper, the Canadian Premier set to work on a new budget that will drastically and directly affect the lives of ordinary Canadians who seek assurances that their government, as ever a world leader in the welfare of its citizens, will once again provide the safety net they need to survive this deep, globally interconnected recession.

So, as Mr. Harper presented his budget to the Parliament last week, what schemes might his Conservative government concoct to see Canada through rough seas? Increased unemployment benefits? Job retraining programs to keep workers at pace with global trends? An Obamaesque commitment to reinvestment in infrastructure?

The answer they got was very simple. Nothing.

The Harper government provided no economic stimulus in the new budget, not even one of his good buddy George W. Bush's ridiculous tax rebate debacles.

And that brings us to the extraordinary situation we see unfolding right above us as we speak. Almost immediately, the opposition parties saw their moment, and thus was born one of the oddest political marriages in Western political history. The three major players in this new arrangement - Canada has never had a formal coalition government since the end of the Dominion - come from very distinct political paths. First, the leader of the opposition, Stephane Dion, leader of the Liberal Party. Quebecois, and with a political mindset forged from the rule of his predecessor, Jean Chretien, Dion led his Liberal Party since defeat in the 2006 election, after the disgraced Paul Martin was forced out by a Conservative non-confidence vote, through this latest round of voting, which saw the worst Liberal defeats in the history of the Party. He was so reviled within his own party that he began the leadership fight to succeed him even before ballots were cast. At this moment, three men are lined up behind him, fighting it out for the position of Liberal leader from May 2009. His political obituary was written, in stone, over the last month, as he seemed bound and determined to leave his party in disarray.

And now, Stephane Dion is the clubhouse leader for Prime Minister in a new government that could be formed within days. Talk about zero to hero...

Also in the mix is the man who has very quietly risen to prominence as one of the most Progressive political leaders in the Western world, Jack Layton. Layton, an Ontarioan and leader of the New Democratic Party has very quickly made himself into a kingmaker of sorts in federal politics. By providing the roadmap back to governance for the Liberal Party, Layton was able to secure six cabinet positions in the proposed new government, as well as a number of lower-level bureaucratic positions of importance for his party. Layton, and the NDP's, influence will thus have much more of a broad impact under this arrangement, particularly given the leadership struggle in what would be the ruling party. Thus, while Layton's gamble does not necessarily cement the NDP as a force to be reckoned with on the federal stage, it does better serve his constituency than Ed Broadbent's fool's errand during the Trudeau period in the 1970s. This, then, is truly the exciting part of the story for progressives on both sides of the border, as Canada looks towards a more progressive stance as America's staunchest ally. Now, that's change you can believe in!

But here's where the story gets really, really (are you even still reading), and I mean, really interesting. Given the disastrous results for the Liberals in the October poll, the combined NDP/Liberal Alliance would represent only 44% of Canadian support and only 114 seats in the Parliament, as opposed to the Conservatives 37% and 143 seats, respectively. So, how do we get this idea off the ground? Mais oui! Le Bloc!

The Bloc Quebecois' 50 seats, and 10% of federal support would push the coalition government to a majority government, of sorts. So, done deal, right? Well...geh...okay, does anyone know the Bloc's single, solitary issue?

Health care? No. The economy? No.

Reinstituting the Quebec Nordiques' hockey franchise? No...well, okay, maybe that too?

Yeah, Le Bloc is the separatist party of Quebec. So now, this coalition Canadian government will be held up by a party whose sole purpose is to work for the "rightful" independence of one of its provinces. However, of all three men who entered into this compact in Ottawa this morning, Gilles Duceppe may be the one who made the critical misstep. First of all, he is now going to have problems at home with the hardcore separatists who will only see him ganging up with a Federalist Quebecois and the Anti-Conservative (BQ voters tend to be issue matched with the Conservative Party) Layton. And second, perhaps more critically, Duceppe has promised to not push a non-confidence motion of his own for eighteen months, effectively declawing Duceppe to hold his former rivals to the fire on issues of import to Quebecois voters. At the first sign of trouble, he should expect a leadership fight bubbling up from the PQ (the provincial wing of the party), especially given Duceppe's own inability to secure more seats in the Federal Parliament or push a referendum on independence in his nearly ten years as party leader.

Now, these three men sit at the same table, a partnership forged from practicality, not politics, putting country before party. This team of rivals can look forward only to uncharted waters and stormy seas, but, if they can make this almost farcical arrangement work, it may cement prosperity for Canadians for decades to come. And, hey, it's fun to watch for us Americans. (Okay, maybe just us political geeks...)

Wall Street to Main Street: The Financial Crisis in Context

2008-09-17T10:19:00.002-04:00

Hello again.

Most of you know where I'm at, but for those who don't. 8 days ago, I quit my job in San Francisco, pulled up stakes (if only briefly) to work with Senator Obama's campaign in Columbus, Indiana. A bit of a seismic shift to be sure, but one which I welcomed with open arms. To spend 50 days to get a man with the character and leadership abilities of Barack Obama is a charge I am honored to take up.

That said, I've been spending a lot of time out on the streets of Columbus (population 40,000), speaking with voters door-to-door, mostly undecided, trying to get them out to vote for Barack. In the last 48 hours, the conversations I've been having have definitely taken a different tack, focusing largely on the economy.

I must say, maybe I'm witnessing an outlier, but for the most part, these independent voters I've been getting to know have been particularly savvy on the issues. They understand that the failures of Lehman, Merrill and AIG have a direct impact in their daily lives. They understand companies like Cummins, the major employer here, do not exist in a vacuum, and that the Wall Street firms provide the capital necessary to keep good paying jobs here in Indiana. And they understand that it is the failed policies of the last eight years of financial mismanagement from George Bush (and, yes, his Congressional henchman - Mr. 90% - John McCain) that have led us to the precipice. Some of the voters I talk to - I tend to go out during the weekdays a lot - are seniors, and they remember Herbert Hoover and the Depression. One woman even told me she thinks McCain's economic outlook reminds her of Hoover (she was pretty feisty!) and it scares.

For God's sake, he uses the same the terminology - the fundamentals of our economy are strong - that Hoover did!

America couldn't afford Herbert Hoover then, and they can't John McHoover now. And these people know it.

---

I'll try to update as much as I can, especially as we help turn Indiana Blue!

McAfee Coliseum: A Thoroughly Adequate Baseball Experience

2008-07-13T20:59:00.002-04:00

Realistically, I was ready to hate McAfee Coliseum. But when I traveled over there this morning for Dave Stewart Retro Jersey day (I was too late to get a jersey. I am still angry about this.) something happened. Something changed. I didn't hate it, and it didn't suck.

Look, the atmosphere is middling to poor at best. They have made some drastic improvements to the place that had miles of foul territory up until recently, but it is still not a great place to watch a game. You are fundamentally disconnected from the action, even in the best seats in the house (not that Mark and I were sitting in them...). But in that way, it reminded me a lot of Yankee Stadium.

Now I know you'll all scream bias when I dump on the Toilet (pun firmly intended), but Yankee Stadium is a fundamentally awful place to watch baseball for the very reason that makes Fenway or AT&T here in San Francisco or Jacobs Field in Cleveland great places to watch baseball. At McAfee, like Yankee Stadium and - actually - like Nationals Park in DC oddly enough, you are so far away from the players and action happening on the field, that it is easy to get distracted, forget about the product on the field, get wrapped up into something else. That kind of thing cannot happen at Fenway or AT&T or Camden Yards, because as a fan in those arenas, you are part of the action. It consumes you. You and your fellow fans rise up and breathe and scream and cheer and boo together. It's the places like those that make baseball special.

Baseball is not special at McAfee. Even just walking through the gigantic concrete behemoth, you understand that the A's are a baseball team playing in a football stadium. The sightlines are wrong. Whole portions of the stadium lie dormant. Your focus is more on the myriad of - just god awful - food and beverage options than on the game. Maybe that's the way they want it, they sell more goods and services and I buy them for lack of anything else to really do. Maybe I'm too much of a purist. Maybe that is just the business of mid-market baseball.

But the stadium - and my ass poor $5 "hot dog" aside - the experience, on balance, was enjoyable. Hell, if you let me go to a baseball game for $9 and not sit behind a pole or look through a peephole or something, I'm taking that deal every day of the week. It was even a good game, Duchscherererererer was dealing, we had two 9th inning rallies, one that won the game, one that fell short, and I got to see K-Rod up close and personal (ok, not THAT close) in the amazing season he's having. It was a thoroughly adequate day out to be sure.

Getting Settled

2008-07-11T19:49:00.002-04:00

The tumult of the last month has been such that I haven't been able to properly sit and think and update the way I wanted to, and told you all that I would. However, I am forced to stay at work until 6 tonight, and all my work is done, so you, dear reader, are the beneficiary of my efficiency yet again.

I have, at long last, and through great pain, suffering, joy and wonder, arrived and settled in the City by the Bay. The last month has seen me on both coasts, in innumerable airports, bars, offices, apartments, and baseball parks, all in a great quest to get out here, once and for all.

The odyssey began in New York, where I received word, as most of you know, that I would be transitioning into a new role as an Associate with the Innovation and Operations Practice of the Corporate Executive Board. Less than 80 hours after making my acceptance, standing in a suit in Union Square, New York, I was in Waterview, Rosslyn, Virginia, getting oriented to my new position.

The three weeks that followed are largely a blur, thanks to my fellow colleagues who started the same day, and whom I quickly dubbed "The Channel 4 News Team." I assumed the role, of course, of Ron Burgundy, and was helped in my efforts to drink, carouse and generally enjoy life by a merry band of characters, including Champ (Peter), Brian Fantana (Jenny), and Alycia, our very own Brick Tamland. They helped fill three weeks of desperate boredom and hostility, stuck in Rosslyn, with stories that, while not fit for such an austere venue as this, will be shared around watercoolers and campfires for years to come.

My introduction to CEB was a whirlwind of acronyms, scripting, mission statements and goal setting. Trying corporate America on for size has been a relatively smooth transition from the world I had been in; almost as if it were far away, so close. Many of my fears of joining the work-a-day world have been allayed. I don't feel soulless and disgusting, or like a snake-oil salesman, or like a complete failure and sellout. In all honesty, the work we do here has real merit for this economy, and for companies to succeed by working together instead of ripping each other apart. It is not quite the socialist, communitarian utopia, but it's a start.

Much of my wariness of the corporate world has been stopped short by the fact that I am living in an incredibly beautiful and vibrant place. San Francisco is a world city, unparalleled in the opportunities it presents and the culture embodied within it. In the same way that the Obama campaign is the Dean campaign perfected (more on that another time), San Francisco is like Boston perfected. Beautiful weather, wonderful people, laid-back attitude, kickass food and wine, all within reach. And yet with the charm and decency of a insular microculture that no city can match. It rivals Cape Town for me in that. Doesn't beat it, but it does rival it.

I am living in Pacific Heights, just off the quiet bustle of Fillmore Street for the month. I am going to find it tough to leave. Between the burger special at Harry's (hands down best in the city), shopping at Mollie Stone's, or just taking in the views from my window, looking over Alta Plaza Park, I have become enchanted with it already. My checkbook on the other hand...oh well, we won't get into that. I literally found the place at the very last minute. I was 6 hours away from being homeless and I pulled through. What luck. A studio, all to myself, for a month, in the best neighborhood in the city. I can't complain.

All in all, the last month has been completely crazy, but I am looking forward to what's next.

Let Us Begin

2008-06-03T19:59:00.004-04:00

Even the clattering dittoheads will acquiesce now.

This evening, amongst the Badlands and the Big Sky, the Junior Senator from the Land of Lincoln will be able to claim victory. Tonight, America will stand for change. Tonight, America will set the stage for the greatest electoral fight of our lives. For tonight, Barack Obama will, finally, be named officially the presumptive Democratic nominee for President of the United States.

Whether he gives a big speech or not, whether his now former opponent will make one final stand or not, whether his new opponent tries to crash the party or not, what tonight signals is a seismic shift in American thinking, in American policy, in the hearts of the American voter and, yes, in American history.

It has often been said that Slavery was this country's original sin. That the kidnapping, enforced labor, sale and genocide of an entire race of people was a major engine in the creation of this country, sadly, must always be acknowledged. Tonight, the presumptive nomination of Barack Obama, may finally begin to work back that stain on our history. A child of the Civil Rights Act, a citizen of the world, his was a candidacy and will be a government, built on a Perfect Political Storm to be sure, but one that has the opportunity to be transformational in nature.

Not merely transactional as many of his predecessors have been, bartering for votes and making concessions out of political expediency, but his was a candidacy and will be a government that will seek to transform American politics and government for generations to come.

He is the legacy of John Fitzgerald Kennedy in that way. He will have the gravitas, the will, the wherewithal, the drive, the determination and the guts to seek change across disciplines and interest groups, in many different segments of the American society. His Presidency will be the next great step in the American Experiment. His is the promise of a new generation.

We may not see the change promised in the next financial quarter, or the next four or eight years, or even in this generation or in our lifetimes. And thus, from the candidate on down, the time has come together as a party, and as a country and as a society and support Barack Obama.

For it will all be a dream without hard work.

The fight of our lives is upon us and will yield the promise of a new American century. Let us begin.

Good Things Come to Those Who Wait

2008-05-31T17:43:00.004-04:00

It was a grim, gray, dull, lazy Saturday here on the Upper East Side of Manhattan. One of those brutal New York days, where the air is thick with the musty odors of the city hanging in humid air. The city is aching to breathe, praying for rain and continuously waiting for the respite to come. It was the perfect day for a field trip.

As the rain finally starts to fall around noon, James, Megan and I make our way into the 4 train. We have decided to get out of the Upper East and make our way to Brooklyn, to one of the centers of food world. I know, leaving Manhattan for good food seems like a crime. Dominic DeMarco makes your trip to Midwood, Brooklyn worth the trip, however.

James and I have been planning this excursion for years. Ever since we first heard from our songwriting hero Mike Doughty of his love for Di Fara Pizza, we have always wanted to try it out. The humble pizzeria had grown in our minds over the years to almost mythic proportions. Di Fara is revered both in and outside of the foodie community, especially amongst the pizza cognoscenti, and we felt that we needed to see it ourselves.

But we had always put it off. I mean, Midwood, Brooklyn might as well be on the far side of the moon. It takes forever to get there and the only real highlights even nearby are Brighton Beach or Coney Island. It literally defines the Bowels of Brooklyn. The time had come, however, because recent life events have dictated a move to the West Coast for yours truly (more on that in the afterword to this post) and with Dominic not getting any younger, we finally pulled the trigger.

So, hot, tired, hungover and hungry, we set off. After the change to the Q train at Union Square, it still took another 35 minutes to get to 14th Street and Avenue J in Midwood. As the skies opened up, we could not believe our luck. In this baptismal experience in pizza culture, the massive rains falling over Brooklyn may help keep the crowds down, and keep our waiting to a minimum.

We ran across 15th Street towards the giant "PIZZA" sign noting the small Di Fara outpost. As we burst into the cramped, blazing hot shop, we immediately took notice of the slower pace of life here. The signs on the wall don't lie. It's worth the wait.

After about five minutes, Dominic's assistant took my order: 1 regular cheese pie, to stay. He asked my name. That was the end of our transaction and conversation. He went back to work assisting the great master in his craft, shaving fresh mozzarella, refilling his sauce bowl, bringing new dough out for Dominic to craft his signature dish.

Dominic is clearly a man of advanced age. He is covered head to toe in flour. Bent slightly at the middle of his back from years of reaching and shaping and massaging and punching and spreading and saucing. He uses few tools: one wooden paddle to insert the pie, one metal paddle to remove the pie and serve, a box grater, a fine grater, a ladle, two oil cans, and a pair of scissors. Most important are his hands, worn into prime dough shaping position from more than a half century of work, calloused, burned, arthritic. These are the hands of a grand master, hands that can tell in one touch of the crust if a pie is done, hands that will reach into a 600 degree oven again and again to remove and reshape pies, hands that have the muscle memory and instinct all their own to make a perfect pie.

I watch him, studying him for almost 45 minutes. Finally he starts working on my pizza. He quickly shapes the ball of dough into a thing sheet, slightly oblong rather than circular, and covers it in flour. He then spreads out his own tomato sauce made fresh that day from rich, sweet San Marzano tomatoes. He then reaches for a loaf of fresh mozzarella and his box grater, shaving long, thick slices of the cheese over the pie. A final dose of extra virgin olive oil and the pie loaded onto the wooden plank and shoved into the oven. And the process repeats itself. Over and over and over again. And the line forms anew and more orders are given, and more people wait and watch and ready themselves.

Finally after about 12 minutes the pizza is ready. Dominic reaches into one of the two ovens (he can only cook four pizzas at a time, hence the wait) and grabs the pizza, sometimes with the metal paddle, sometimes with his bare hands and places it on a metal pie pan. He then tops it immediately with finely shaven mozzarella (not fresh, think more like string cheese mozzarella), fresh oregano which he cuts with his scissors and a final dose of olive oil. He asks whose pizza it is, shouting initials or a name written by his sous chef.

You give him your $20 and run to one of the few tables in the little shop. You want so desperately, after waiting what seems like forever in anticipation (in our case, we only waited about 45 minutes or so), to just rip into the beautiful delicious, bubbling, oozing pie. But you control yourself, if only for a moment, knowing that the charred dough and boiling cheese and creamy sauce are still white hot. But you remember, good things come to those who wait.

Finally, you can't control yourself anymore. You tear into the first slice. It is sloppy, gooey, hard to hold or control, even harder to cool down.

But then you taste the work of the grand master and it all melts away.

Pizza is delightfully simple, but when put together in the right way, with the right ingredients it is absolutely the greatest substance ever created by mankind. In Dominic's case, he has found the perfect blend of the ingredients. And his time tested methods and his personal skill and know-how allow him to create the perfect pie.

As James, Megan and I sat, briefly to take in the immensity of wonderful tastes and smells and experiences we had just borne witness to, we were awash in realizations about pizza and life and other things of import. There is no place on Earth like Di Fara. After Dominic is gone, hopefully not for many years, the little, cramped space at 14th and J will fade into the long history of Brooklyn lore, a place lost in time and forever remembered by all those who were there, then. But the memories of a day so long anticipated, and so humbly rewarding will remain forever.

Go to Di Fara for yourself. See the grand master and working class hero work. Smell the air. And yes, taste the pizza. And remember, good things come to those who wait.

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AFTERWORD

So yes, it has been a while. I have recommitted myself to this blog (famous last words) and intend to write a lot more about the issues we all (read: I) care about (the election, baseball, food and wine). The last couple months have been rough, but I'm happy to say that come the end of June I am off on a new journey in my life, taking up residence in the City by the Bay. Friends on the west coast be advised, and friends elsewhere, come visit anytime!

Delicious and Nutritious (For The Ears)

2008-02-19T22:11:00.002-05:00

I have had today marked on my calendar for a long time. Well, a few months anyway. Today, Mike Doughty finally released his anticipated fourth solo studio album Golden Delicious on ATO Records. Like any good fan, I awoke early and downloaded the album from the iTunes Music Store, and enjoyed a first listen on my iPhone on the way to work.

The Dan Wilson (he of Semisonic...thus answering the question of "Hey, whatever happened to them?") produced album strikes the upbeat tone indicative of Doughty's work to date. Since leaving Soul Coughing, the "neo-jazz" (which was a term, created by music journalists in the late '90s, to describe whatever the hell it was that band was concocting) ensemble which blazed a trail for later artists with albums as diverse and rich in music texture as Ruby Vroom and El Oso, and kicking a heroin addiction which had begun to consume his life and artistic talent, Doughty's work has gotten progressively more happy. As he settles into his middle thirties in his beloved Brooklyn, each of his albums, beginning with Skittish, right up to today's release, have sounded sunnier tones, if the subject matter is still, occasionally, depressive, bordering on morose. Still, "I Wrote a Song About Your Car" would not have been heard from a guy writing "Laundrytown" and "No Peace, Los Angeles" ten years ago.

Is this album Doughty's best effort to date? I believe so. And I like this album for the same reason I liked the movie Juno; it is delightfully uncomplicated. Songs like "Fort Hood" and "Book of Love" are surely thought-provoking, but they are, at the same time, 3 to 5 minute pop songs, bulwarked by Doughty's unassuming yet provocative and singular vocal work. Like Juno, it was a solid work bringing together excellent parts to paint a good story. Subtext and self-importance need not apply here. This album is not Synchronicity or Joshua Tree or even Before These Crowded Streets. But the album stands alone on its merit as a great collection of songs that together weave a story of its time and place, and set the stage for Doughty's solid work to continue for albums to come.

Definitely give an earnest listen to "Fort Hood," Doughty's homage to Iraq soldiers, both suffering and dead, who have not received the devotion and thanks from this country and its citizens for whom they have given so much. "You should still be getting stoned with a prom dress girl/You should still believe in an endless world/You should blast Young Jeezy with your friends in a parking lot" should not be as compelling a lyric as it is, and yet in this time and in this scenario, it rings a deep and profound truth.

And there is something strangely poetic about wanting the girl in the blue dress to keep on dancing. That's pure Doughty, as he said on last weekend's All Things Considered. Assessing the essence of the mess is his very own essence and his wheelhouse. And that's what makes "Blue Dress" the most likable song, along with Put It Down" and "Navigating by the Stars at Night" on this, Mike Doughty's latest slice-of-life vignette of the outskirts of Hipster America.

Best. Campaign Video. Ever.

2008-02-02T15:02:00.000-05:00

"Words. Words when spoken out loud for the sake of performance are music. They have rhythm and pitch and timbre and volume. These are the properties of music and music has the ability to find us and move us and lift us up in ways that literal meaning can't." - Jed Bartlet

What strikes me in watching this video of the words of Sen. Obama's Iowa Victory Speech is the message wrapped into the rhythmic cadence of his inspiring oratorio. Here stands a man - with followers neatly in tow - not just asking us to believe in the promise of America again, not simply asking that we dream of the things that never were, but to put our hope into action. To do, as the last frames of the video suggest, to turn our hopes into votes. To work together, in this time of great trial as a nation, to make our nation whole, and united, and strong again. To believe in hope, yes, but moreover to be the change we seek in the world. It is only in hard work, in reconciliation, in trial and triumph that America will be great again.

Let us begin.

The Best Thing To Come Out Of Illinois Since Barack Obama

2008-01-26T21:36:00.001-05:00

That's right, it's time for Top Chef: Chicago!

Published reports say the Bravo favorite will light the burners for their fourth season on March 12th at 10pm ET. Tom, Ted, Gail and, oh yes, the extra yummy Padma will all be back with a cavalcade of celebrity guest stars (Sadly, we have not, as yet, been advised of a cameo from Bill Swerski's Super Fans, or Wayne and Garth.) as we embark upon another culinary odyssey.

If you want to check out the early favorites for the $100K, Food and Wine spread, awesome vacation and Glad Ware, click on over to YumSugar, who have a slideshow of the new season's contestants.

Now, please pack your knives and go.

Bistro Bis? More Like Bistro F.

2008-01-16T21:54:00.000-05:00

I decided, at the behest of my good friend and former campaign roommate Julie, to drop a little honest coin and indulge in Washington's annual Restaurant Week. Ever ambitious, Julie made several reservations in the DC metro area, but we decided on Bistro Bis, which I had heard about through the grapevine as being pretty decent fare. Also, I'm a sucker for solid bistro French food at all times. So we gave it a shot.

First of all, as I was rushed to our table upon entrance, I noticed various empty tables throughout the fairly small restaurant. This probably should have been more ominous, since it's Restaurant Week and you cannot get a reservation anywhere in the District, but I sloughed it off, chalking it up to Wednesday night. As it turns out, the absentees knew more than I did.

I quickly ordered a glass of the special South African Cabernet from Wellington, which was actually quite decent. It also turned out to be the high point.

35 minutes later, our waitress finally appeared ready to take our order. In the intervening time Julie and I got catch up and I got to have a drink. Oh, this might be a good time to mention the other absentees: the waitstaff. It took twenty minutes to get water (bread would take ANOTHER 20) and finally - mercifully - we got to put in orders.

Julie ordered the moules grenobloises, trout special and chocolate toffee bread pudding. I chose a more traditional bistro route with onion soup les halles, cote de porc and chocolate roulade. The appetizers were passable though often forgettable. My soup was overpowered by brandy in the broth and it was, inexcusably, served lukewarm. (It's French Onion Soup, for Christ's sake.) Julie's mussels were nice, but oversized for an appetizer. The main course was where the meal totally lost its luster. Julie's trout looked decent enough - I admit I didn't try it - but my pork chop was completely lifeless. And to make it worse, it was covered in some kind of ridiculous, flavor-retardant barbecue sauce without any starch on the plate.

You know what guys? i know it's restaurant week, but stop treating us like cheap rubes. I mean, Jesus, this is not New York, it's Washington. Getting people in the door for haute cuisine is enough of a struggle, don't make those of us trying to enjoy an experience like this on short money feel stupid for having chose you. Have the common decency to do the little things, despite the drop in price. It's bistro food. I demand potatoes. Not a lot, just a taste, something interesting maybe. But at least something. Not a half empty plate. If you're working in DC, and you're not Michel Richard or Jose Andres, get over yourself and fill plates. And if you're pushing half empty plates at a bistro, that's borderline insane.

And in any case, don't lose a perfectly good medium rare pork chop in barbecue sauce.

Dessert was hit and miss. Julie's chocolate toffee was a good effort, and tasty, if non-inventive. My roulade was flat and nearly bereft of chocolate, though the berries left a pleasant brightness on the palate. All in all, I've soured on the restaurant week experience. If DC restaurants are all like Bistro Bis, people will continue to forcefeed themselves overpriced steaks at Sam and Harry's and the Palm and the food scene here will die.

Restuarant Week or not, however, skip Bistro Bis.

You're Not Wrong, Walter, You're Just Illiterate

2008-01-09T21:35:00.000-05:00

Quite the barnburner last night in the Granite State.

Hillary Clinton went from being clinically dead (at least according to known feminist Chris Matthews) at 6pm to the "frontrunner for the Democratic nomination" by Midnight.

That actually happened. And while I believe all of those far-off prognostications about as far I can throw Hillary Clinton, we have been taught in American politics these days to expect the expected, that pollsters have gotten so good at what they do that they could never be wrong and that whatever they feed the mainstream media must be correct, because they got it right once or twice before. And the media, largely lacking the ability to use critical thinking and decipher what polls actually mean, report polling numbers as facts and then get pissed off when that's not the whole story, and legions of them look foolish on national television.

But the problem with both of those memes is that even a casual observer of the American political process would have known by 8:15 last night that something wasn't right. Actually, scratch that, anyone with an eighth grade education (or your typical New Hampshire primary voter) who can use a calculator would tell you that 40+30+15=85. By the best estimates, 15% of voters were undecided when they walked into the polls last night, and that's if you only look at the numbers. (And don't bother telling me "Oh you forgot about Kucinich." I didn't forget about Kucinich, we just all wish he forgot about us. Lunatic. Honest to God, he already talks about aliens, if he starts talking nude conspiracies, he and Lyndon Larouche are going to run on the Looney Tune ticket.)

This situation also reminds us why tracking polls are crack for the weak. When there are only about 100 hours from the results being announced in Iowa until people started voting in New Hampshire, no pollster worth his weight whatever they were feeding the media all day yesterday would tell you that all bets were off. And then, when you factor in at least two huge events happening in an 18-hour span (the debate and Hillary's odd, salty discharge moment [non-sexual division]) history will take over.

See, people in New Hampshire are regarded as "private" people. They may actually just be "ridiculous" people but any way you slice it, they openly lie to pollsters in a vain attempt to try and get them off their backs. We go through this every four years: New Hampshireites (New Hampshirians?) are oversaturated with campaign materiel, candidates, pollsters, pundits and toast and egg breakfasts at diners, and they get hostile, wanting everyone to leave town, and thinking they never will. So they lie. They lie to staffers. They lie to pollsters. They lie to whoever will listen to their insane rants about their "problems" (Word to the wise, the only problems you have in New Hampshire are not enough NASCAR and too much snow and it was 65 degrees yesterday and the race is probably coming up, so shove it). They claim, despondently, that they just want to be left in peace. Then they vote and we all figure out that they were lying all along and we leave and talk about them for about 24 more hours and then we move on to the other 48 states and the real issues facing the nation.

And then, two years from now, New Hampshire will demand to know where we all have gone and invite all the politicians and pundits and pollsters and gentrified media types back for toast and eggs and demand that we fawn over these hardworking Americans facing down their withering past in a new American century. And for some reason, we oblige them.

And we are left with one simple, incontrovertible fact: That as the sun rises through the snowdrifts of Dover and Portsmouth on primary day and sets over the desolate hellscape of Keene on the evening of primary day, two-thirds of New Hampshire voters, whether they tell you or not, whether they know better or not, whether they care or not, will go to the polls (after eating their toast and eggs, of course) and stand in a booth, furrowing their brows in a vain attempt to understand and THAT IS WHEN THEY MAKE A DECISION.

These are people that make swing voters look like decisive party boosters. These are people who sling coffee and eat toast and eggs and yearn for simpler time when their lack of understanding and cultural diversity seemed to fit in Wonder Bread America.

These people are New Hampshire, for better or worse. And someday, people in politics will understand them. And run far, far away.

[/rant]

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And yes, thank you, it is good to be back.

There They Go Again

2007-11-14T21:03:00.000-05:00

As I finished up this week's episode of Boston Legal on the TiVo at around 8:58, I decided I would catch the last couple minutes of Olbermann on MSNBC. He was talking about the latest nonsense coming out of the Britney Spears camp, which would be mildly amusing if small children weren't involved. Usually, when he throws his paper and talks it being the 1,659th day or whatever since President Bush declared Mission Accomplished in Iraq, that's when I find something else somewhere up the dial. Instead, tonight, I hung on for the first couple minutes of Dan Abrams' show. He was talking about Judith Regan and a lawsuit filed against NewsCorp, accusing Rupert Murdoch and Roger Ailes, among others, of telling Regan to lie under oath about her illicit relationship with disgraced former New York Police Commish and Homeland Security nominee Bernie Kerik. Kerik and Regan, of course, had an affair after 9/11, and on several occasions may have consummated that relationship in a Lower Manhattan flat dedicated to hosting relief workers working at Ground Zero.

Now, generally this story is one marked for Page 6 in the Post. However, what we have here may actually be quite insidious. Why would Rupert Murdoch and Roger Ailes go out of their way to defend Bernard Kerik? Might it be, as Abrams alleged, some kind plot to protect Giuliani as he moves towards his date with the cast of the bad reality show we call the GOP Primary process?

We need look no further than what was airing at the same time on Fox News. I thought perhaps they'd be running the latest political intrigue with the Democratic primaries, or some ridiculous story about another lost suburban white girl, or something just as idiotic. Instead, what they were running was not just repulsive, it validated all parts of Dan Abrams' argument. At the EXACT SAME TIME MSNBC was running a story talking about Fox "News" may be covertly - perhaps even overtly - supporting one candidate for the Presidency, Hannity and Colmes (I was going to write a joke here, but I'm pretty sure it writes itself) was broadcasting a program-length commercial for Rudy Giuliani, starring his new best friend, Conservative ninny Pat Robertson.

The tagline running under Robertson's loathsome visage actually talked of him "discussing his endorsement of Giuliani."

Let me try to say this in plain terms: A purported news outlet is currently allowing an avowed misogynistic bigot to discuss his idealistic defense of a three-time philanderer with whom he shares no political views in order to drum up support for his campaign.

We have to be left to wonder, what took us so long for us all to catch on?

All Your Sport Are Belong To Us

2007-11-05T18:34:00.000-05:00

It's a great day to be alive in America. I've walked into my office each morning for about the last three weeks saying that. It is simply amazing to see what is happening in the city of Boston right now. It figures, of course, that it all starts clicking as soon as I leave, by the way. I guess I can never move back.

What the Patriots did yesterday moved them into the pantheon of great NFL teams. Teams like the Cowboys of the early 1990s, the 49ers of the 1980s or the Steelers of the 1970s. They are approaching immortality. They are approaching that rarified air that few teams ever reach, the immortality that is born of special teams. Teams like the '67 Packers, or the '85 Bears, or, of course the best of them all, the 1972 Miami Dolphins. What we all are watching is simply amazing. Tom Brady's season, barring an unthinkable injury, will go down as the best in NFL history. At the rate he's going, he will surpass Peyton Manning shortly after Thanksgiving. It is a treat to watch, and anyone who thinks otherwise, despite all of the ridiculous "Spygate" musings, just does not truly appreciate football. He is making a case that he may not just be having the best year of any quarterback in history, he may just be the best skill player in NFL history.

By the way, in case we forgot, the Celtics look like world beaters, and the Red Sox won the World Series last week. I'm told the Bruins are playing hockey at a high level, but I think we're all willing to accept that pro hockey isn't even a sport anymore. And sorry, but BC were WAY overrated even before they got whupped by Florida State. That said, there can only be one reaction when we take into account all these wonderful happenings:

Somebody set us up the bomb.

Indeed.

In The Land Where Champions Roam

2007-10-22T12:31:00.000-04:00

This must be a dream.

Some kind of twisted fantasy land where things go right in Boston. Where the Red Sox ascend to the American League Pennant with minimal hardship. Where the Patriots slough off would-be contenders with the greatest of ease. Where the Celtics can go from cellar dwellers to an all-start team in the course of a summer.

Yes, it is a magical time to be in Boston.

That's why I'm glad I was back this weekend. I stopped up here for Carnival, Year Up's big national fundraiser, and got to hang on to witness an incredible weekend in Boston. The air seems lighter here, not only because of the global warming-inspired heat wave that's taken hold over New England, but because that pall of fear that usually hangs over us at this time of year has long since dissipated. The excitement gripping this city, this region has us all pinching ourselves.

The Red Sox are on the brink, as one newscaster put it last night, of making sure it won't be another damned 86 years. There has never, in my lifetime, been a Red Sox team as good as this one. The 2004 squad will always be in our hearts, bu they were a rag tag bunch of idiots who knew how, when and where to get hot and end all the misery. There were times during last night's game that the Sox' despatching of the Indians looked almost clinical. Teams that win championships have a new hero every night. Last night, we had the much-maligned (for the last week or so) Dustin Pedroia step up and give his answer to why he should. by any reasoning, be the Rookie of the Year. And we had Jonathan Papelbon come in and slam the door in the 8th in a situation in which we desperately needed to right the ship. This team is the best to ever wear the uniform, a fact that will be proven over the course of the next few days between Boston and Denver.

And the New England Patriots? What can we even say about them that hasn't already been said. They are one of those special teams in NFL history already and it's only Week 7. They will be mentioned in the annals of history, certainly with the '85 Bears and the 1980s 49ers and Cowboys. But the 1972 Dolphins, a team unmatched in sport, much less only in football, will need a certain amount of luck if they are to have their champagne party again this year. In two weeks, we should have our answer. If the Patriots beat the Colts, they will almost certainly be unstoppable. No one else on the schedule should provide any measure of competition to a team playing at the level of the Patriots. If Tom Brady had not already cemented his place in Canton, he is doing it this season. As I watched him slice and dice the Miami secondary yesterday, I couldn't even think of another quarterback who made it look so easy, so effortless. Not even Joe Montana in his prime could do what Brady did. Not Dan Marino. Not Johnny Unitas. Tom Brady is not just the greatest quarterback of his generation anymore. We may be watching the highlight reel of the NFL's greatest ever quarterback.

It's good to be home.

Mystique, Aura, Gang Colors

2007-08-24T16:51:00.000-04:00

Why is it that no part of this new report surprises me in the slightest?

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,294409,00.html

Actually, I take that back. The only thing that surprised me is that Yankee paraphernalia wasn't already considered gang colors.

The Coast

2007-08-20T20:43:00.000-04:00

I finally get it.

For years, literally years, people have been telling me to experience Northern California. "You'll love San Francisco if you love Boston," they said. "If you like LA you will be blown away by the North coast." And other things like that. I finally got sick of hearing it all, and I went to check it out for myself. Luckily, I also finally got the excuse with Megan's family headed out for the wedding of her Aunt Erin. So last Friday night Meggie and I boarded a JetBlue flight at Kennedy Airport bound for San Jose. For the next nine days, I had some of the coolest experiences I've had in the US. Here is just a taste.

You Can Find Me In The Cove

From the moment I saw it, walking towards the park on the Embarcadero, I knew AT&T Park was going to be for me. Now, of course, there is no place in the world like Fenway. It is the ultimate cathedral to baseball. If you don't know this by now, then you are just not paying attention. However, teams of late have been building markedly better stadia throughout the major leagues. I've been to a few of the new generation parks, Jacobs Field and Camden Yards among others, and while they are definite improvements, surely the Park at 24 Willie Mays Plaza must be the crown jewel. It is straight out of the old school. Despite the fact that our group tickets were in the third deck, I felt almost on top of the action. Not that there was a whole lot of action going on between the Giants and Pirates, but still, I felt close to the players and the game. We Red Sox fans are spoiled rotten these days, because we get 81 days a year where we get to see our boys play in those hallowed grounds. But if I ever had to choose another place to watch 81 games a year, AT&T Park would be it.

Wild World

I never made it to the Wild Coast of South Africa. I will certainly have to see it when I go back, but for now, the Mendocino coastline will have be a placeholder. It is a truly wild, rough place. As Highway 1 cuts north, slicing its way along the coastline, the vistas and ruggedness become ever more pronounced. The Mendocino headlands, in Mendocino village, a quaint seaside community for ex-hippie burnouts and, as it happened, "Murder, She Wrote" fans (it was filmed there), were the best part. An underground maze of caves and grottoes, punctuated by cliffs and beachheads, the headlands are a wonderful place to wile away the lazy afternoons hours, getting a chance to see what the California coast has looked like for centuries. And yes, even we indoor kids can enjoy it.

Foodie Paradise

I always loved going to Cooperstown when I was young. It was a monument to the game of baseball which had become a huge part of my life even in my youth. So it was no surprise that I got an analogous feeling as I arrived at COPIA - the Center for Food, Wine and the Arts, in Napa, CA. Eating in Julia Child's kitchen, the flavors I had recognized from my youth permeated throughout the air, as the wondrous smells wafted in from the open kitchen. My mom learned to cook while she nursed me, watching Saint Julia on PBS when I went down for my afternoon nap. And as we passed through the courses - Curried Summer Squash Bisque, Flatiron Steak with Garlic Smashed Potatoes, and Bing Cherry Strudel - I could almost hear the sharp tones of Julia's well-worn old New England voice lilting through those aromas, making the most elegant and decadent food accessible to us all. After lunch, I got to see exactly just how much of a playground COPIA could be. I stopped off at the Wine Spectator Tasting Center and did their "Judgment of Paris" tasting - a tribute to the famed 1976 Paris Tasting, in which I got to experience both Stag's Leap Artemis and Chateau Montelena Chard, both worth the price of admission. Then we wrapped up our visit, walking through the Edible Garden, taking in the different tastes and smells as the open-air pantry excited all the senses simultaneously in a veritable sensual orgy of foodgasm. A perfect, leisurely end to a wonderful visit to the monument for food.

Love, California Style

From the town that inspired Alfred Hitchcock's masterwork "The Birds," I got the chance to experience possibly the most beautiful wedding in the most beautiful setting you could ever conceive. How's that for an image? Nestled snuggly on the northern rim of Monterey Bay, the Monarch Cove Inn provided a veritable Shangri-La for the celebration of Megan's aunt, Erin, and the man who has become the love of her life, Ralph, and their commitment to each other. Now, don't get me wrong, I haven't gone all soft on you or anything. But I think you know enough about me by now that despite my tendencies towards sarcasm and cynicism, at heart I am an old hopeless romantic. And I believe in the power of love. Never before has that been feeling been more palpable in one time and one place than on that breezy Saturday afternoon. The setting sure helped, as did Ralph's signature "Swimming Naked" drink - and the 7 of them I drank (Ask for the recipe, it's pretty much the best beverage I've ever tasted. Ever. Including beer.). But the high point, and the one that slayed just about everybody was the expression of love in the couple's vows. Most times, people writing their own vows end up sounding like Rachel McAdams' sailor sister in Wedding Crashers, or Homer Simpson - "in richness and in poorness, in times when flying monkeys..." - in a word, hokey. But love flowed in the words Erin and Ralph shared with each other. As with everything else on Saturday, it was an exactly perfect microcosmic representation of their lives together. And in those words, and in that moment, in that perfect place and time, they created an everlasting bond with each other, and between both of their families and for the new family they will build in the coming years, and one that I am privileged to which I am honored to have borne witness.

We had lots of great experiences. The above are just a few selections. I owe a great debt of gratitude to the entire Bentley family for the experience. And I invite you to check out more pictures on Facebook for more from the California Odyssey.

New Digs

2007-08-08T14:41:00.000-04:00

The intarnets, as we all know, are a series of tubes. And on these tubes is carried information. In some cases, that information takes pictographical form. Here follows some pictures, specifically of my new room in my apartment in Crystal City, Virginia. (Note: If you're reading this on Facebook, the images will probably not push to the RSS feed. Click over to the proper blog to see them.)

Here's my new bed.

But, more importantly, here is my entertainment pavilion.

Anyway, it's a big room in a really nice apartment with my wonderful new roommates, James and Cynthia, in a very swank high-rise building in the heart of Crystal City. I'm excited! Also, you should probably make plans to come visit me soon. I like company.

Go Get Your Shinebox

2007-08-02T11:18:00.000-04:00

Joey has - mercifully - taken his leave from Top Chef. The Brooklyn-born meathead, who some may have found endearing in the same way Mike was last season, finally let his mule-like obstinacy get in the way of preparing a dish correctly, and it caught up with him. I agree with the judges' decision, but also am keenly aware that apart from Howie, who might just be a more refined form of Joey, each of the contestants at Judges Table could have gone home last night for cause.

Let's start with Sara Mair. For god's sake, Howie's tirade was spot on. She brought nothing to the table last night. And she is obviously not going to win this competition. However, her sins did not loom as large as Joey's by the mere fact that her were sins of omission, not execution. By contrast, Joey executed his dish incorrectly and paid the price. All Sara did was gainsay all of Howie's ideas, to the point where the dish became an unsettled mess. But even her lack of fundamental execution did not rise high enough amidst the chaos and confusion to warrant being second in the line of fire in my view.

That honor goes to Hung and his ridiculous behavior in the kitchen. As Anthony Bourdain would say, Hung displayed an incredible lack of "chefly qualities." When you run a kitchen, if one of the guys you work with is doing something wrong, you beat him with a frying pan until he gets it. Hung, very quietly, said "Gee whiz, Joey, we really oughta freeze things individually." And then when Joey the meathead didn't get it, he shut up and let the dish fail! Had it been my decision to make, Hung's actions would almost have risen to the level of Joey's transgressions and definitely merited discussion about sending him home. He is clearly a very gifted cook, but he is not a chef. Full stop. He can't run a kitchen and that became obvious last night. Now maybe he will learn from these experiences and hone that part of his craft a little finer as he ages and gets wiser, but Hung proved last night that he does not deserve the title of Top Chef.

In the end, however, the dish that sank Joey was doomed from the start. It honestly wouldn't have been very good before it was frozen, especially against masterwork like that presented by Tre and CJ and the extremely surprising effort from Casey and Dale. So Joey's time was up. He went about as far as I would have expected him too, exceeding expectations a few times and only meeting them for the rest.

G-Day

2007-08-01T11:59:00.000-04:00

Garnett and Gagne in the same day? In Boston? No way...

Though I'm in the midst of packing (read: SHOULD BE in the midst of packing) to make the move to Crystal City, Virginia this weekend, I felt I needed to take some time out to pass on my thoughts about yesterday in Boston sports. I mean, seriously, the day I decide to leave Boston, the Red Sox acquire the dominant bullpen arm they need for security down the stretch and the Celtics acquire a first ballot hall-of-famer and complete the new big three. Just my luck.

Gagne will hopefully always be remembered as the final piece of the puzzle that brought the Red Sox their second World Series title in four years. Garnett should become a legend in Celtics history as the cornerstone of the new Big Three. I mean, can you even conceive of the fact that this town is now host to the odds-on favorites to win their respective championships in three sports? We haven't even spoken about the Patriots, and all they did in the offseason was go out and get Adalius Thomas, Donte Stallworth and Randy Moss, three of the best players in the NFL. They just opened training camp being picked by everybody and anybody with an opinion on the National Football League to win Super Bowl XLII, and they are a distant third on the sports pages this morning.

First, we have to talk about the Garnett trade. With Pierce and Allen, the Celtics can afford to throw out Rajon Rondo (who looked overmatched during last year's tanking debacle) and Kendrick Perkins to round out the starting five. And as much as I hate Brian Scalabrine, he just became a very important piece. Now that he can be a sixth man and not a starter, he can help shoulder the load when KG and/or Perkins needs a rest. Now, the Celtics still need to go out and sign a veteran defensive presence because not one of this new Big Three plays a whole lot of defense (I'm looking at you, Ray Allen) before they can truly be labeled as Championship contenders. But since the Eastern Conference has gone from bad to worse in the last three years, they have become the immediate favorites to go to the NBA Finals. This from a team that was more focused on lottery balls than winning games last year. Still, bleeding green just came back into fashion in Beantown.

And now, Gagne. My father put it in the best perspective last night as we discussed the trade, "So, essentially, the starter has to go about three innings and we'll have a fighting chance every night?" Exactly. Now when Lester starts losing steam after six, we can go to this combo in the bullpen: Delcarmen/Timlin in the 7th, Okajima/Gagne in the 8th, Papelbon in the 9th. With pitching like that, this team can hit .245 the rest of the way and win more than they lose. Everyone will be rested when they need to be. Everyone will be able to shoulder - no pun intended - the load. Let's also put this in perspective. The Yankees traded the ONLY semi-reliable arm in their bullpen, Scott Proctor, yesterday for Wilson Betemit, knowing they will need a third baseman when A-Rod skips town in about 60 days. That's the best you could do, Brian Cashman? I never honestly thought the Yankees would lie down and play dead. But they have to understand that they cannot keep winning games by 13 runs like last night. Eventually, they are going to start playing real competition, not the White Sox and Devil Rays, and they will need pitching. That, not bats, wins championships.

That said, the Red Sox desperately needed to move Wily Mo Pena before yesterday and they didn't do it. They also need a more reliable bat off the bench and glove in the outfield. Jermaine Dye was not the answer. Bobby Kielty might be, and I can't for the life of me figure out why they didn't take a flyer on him. But Wily Mo Pena does not fit on this team. Despite Big Papi's assurances that Pena works very hard, and I have no doubt that he does, this team does not need a guy who can't hit curve balls. They need a singles guy, with a little pop off the bench, someone who will get on base so we can score runs in the late innings to give our uber-bullpen some breathing room. But who knows, maybe Theo has something else up his sleeve.

In any case, this time in history has been great for Boston sports, and yesterday's G-Day helped solidify those good feelings for times to come.

Gainfully Employed!

2007-07-25T13:22:00.001-04:00

The long and winding road of the job search has finally come to an end. I have been offered and intend to accept a position with Year Up in Washington, DC. I should start at the end of next month. Year Up is a growing national non-profit, originally based in Boston, which conducts a year-long program for urban youths, aged 18-24, helping them to gain access to the corporate world. The organization works with many corporate partners including AOL, Freddie Mac, Bank of America, JP Morgan and State Street Bank just to name a few, and was given a Social Capitalist award by Fast Company magazine (long known for their leadership in identifying key business trends, as seen in their article "Joe Trippi's Killer App") last year solidifying their place as one the country's best and fastest growing non-profits. You can learn more about us at www.yearup.org.

As for me, I'll be filling the role of Apprenticeships and Grants Coordinator, which means I will be interfacing a lot with our corporate partnerships, helping to secure placements for the students we enroll in the organization, as well as liaising with alumni and also mentoring a few students along the way.

If you can't tell, I am thrilled to death by the prospect of joining such a wonderful organization and moving to a great place like DC. (On that note, if anybody needs a roommate, let me know!) I'm sad to leave Boston, especially at the height of a pennant race, but am ready for and excited by what's next.

Camille...Sorry, Have We Met?

2007-07-12T15:35:00.000-04:00

I have one question after last night's Top Chef.

Who was Camille? I really didn't know she was on the show until she went home.

Seriously, the reason she went home is that she finally distnguished herself. Poorly. Her idea of miniature pineapple upside down cakes fell about as flat as Sara's uninspired "Semifreddo" the difference being that Camille had never done anything of note on the show, good or bad.

I will say this, the pineapple idea was really solid, combining fruit and dessert in that setting was a good idea. However, every idea that flowed from that kernel of goodness was completely off base. There is so much that they could have done with pineapple, including lots of things that did not involve having pastry chef experience, that would have been both inventive and tasty, and they went in exactly none of those directions. They thought they'd be able to cry foul at the judges table and limp away becuase they had no experience. Not in this competition, baby.

On another note, while Casey's dish was probably fairly weak, I think it came about as a product of environment as opposed to lack of skill or mailing it in. Working with the hair-brained scheme twins, Howie and Joey, must have been exhausting. Finally knowing she could not go home her distracted mess of a creation didn't seem so bad in the final analysis. Hopefully next week, we'll get back to mano a mano cookoffs rather than the team aspect.

Independence

2007-07-03T21:34:00.000-04:00

Since I read the news last night about President Bush's commutation of the 30-month sentence levied by a jury on I. Lewis "Scooter" Libby, I have been literally consumed by anger. I wanted so desperately to get my feelings on this matter out to you. I haven't been able to think of the words.

Keith Olbermann did.

Read every word that he wrote and spoke on tonight's "Countdown" on MSNBC. Then read it again. Then search for it on YouTube and watch it. The visceral anger in both Olbermann's words and the tenor of his voice give even greater depth to his words. Here is a man who stands up. Here is a man, quoting from a lexicon of Americana so broad and deep as to include James Madison and John Wayne and who steadfastly and passionately demands of the President of the United States to come to the same conclusion many of us already have, that it is time for him to go. Here stands a patriot, a man who loves his country so deeply that he is nearly brought to tears by the actions of a government with utter distaste for the people they are meant to govern.

Let me be clear. I stand with Keith Olbermann. I stand with every word he spoke and with the power of his voice like a clarion call crying out in the wilderness. The time has come for patriotic Americans to demand better of the government in whom a thin plurality of us have twice called to serve. What happened to Scooter Libby was not a miscarriage of justice, it was the complete undoing of justice in America. We are barely thirty years from Watergate and we have allowed ourselves to be duped again by mad charlatans who crave only power, nothing more and nothing less. This country needs more brave men and women to proclaim that they are mad as hell and not going to take it anymore.

They must no longer be allowed to question my patriotism, my commitment to this grand idea of America, simply because we disagree. What kind of arrogance is that? What kind of cowardice is that? And they must not be allowed to subvert the laws which hold this country together.

This president, this administration, and this government have failed to serve the American people. It is high time they consider their misdeeds. And if they will not, then the Congress must do what is right and begin drafting Articles of Impeachment against Messrs. Bush and Cheney.

Happy Independence Day.

Stoking the Fires

2007-06-25T14:45:00.001-04:00

I feel like I never write about the Red Sox. I mean, to be fair, there's not much to write about when you're 11 games ahead in the AL East, with the hated Yankees fading quickly into the morass of sub-par franchises yet again. And trust me, as I sit here in New York, that fact is not sitting well. Driving in yesterday with Megan for a week of dipsaluscious vacation and job interviewing, I caught the end of the Giants-Yankees matchup on 880. John Sterling and Suzyn (or however the hell you spell that worthless tramp's name) Waldman were practically apoplectic at the sight of this once proud franchise dropping five games out of six - including a sweep by the Colorado Rockies - in increasingly poor fashion. Sterling, who I truly believe is actually an elaborate macro rather than an actual human being, was shooting his mouth off about how bad this team was, and how much they needed pitching and all the rest of the things Yankee fans lean on when the team is down. How much they actually believe that it's everybody else's fault that they're losing.

It's disgusting.

But it does mean one very important thing, which is why I'm here to talk about the Red Sox. The Yankees are, as always, big buyers at the trade deadline, which is a scant 36 days away, according to the Buzz Blog over at Boston.com. This year presents a particularly interesting scenario because so many teams are so bad, but in the American League, the two teams to watch are the White Sox and Rangers. Both teams look to be sellers coming towards July 31. Now, traditionally, the Yankees make waves at the Deadline with one big-name signing and some smaller signings, usually pitchers, that always seem to pan out. Here's the problem. These are some names of seemingly available players.

Mark Buehrle.

Mark Teixiera.

Eric Gagne and/or Akinori Otsuka.

You add any or all of those guys to the mix over in the Bronx and all of a sudden that 11 1/2 games back third place team fading into indignity becomes a force to be reckoned with in August and September. And with this Red Sox having missed the injury boat thus far, it could be a late season hiccup that sends this team into a tailspin. But does that mean that the Red Sox should be buying at the Deadline?

Ironically, yes.

They have several important pieces that could make a difference for middling teams. They do have the prospects to ship out of town as well as veteran players. Here are some players whose names I think you'll see mentioned and why.

Mike Lowell: He's 32. He's got an expiring contract. He's having his best hitting year in a while. And as much as he has become an integral part of this Red Sox team, and as much as he is a stand up guy who I would personally hate to see leave the community, teams like Minnesota, and even the White Sox - who may still be able to make a late season run in an oversold Central - need a solid corner infielder who plays incredible defense. And we can move Kevin Youkilis back to his natural position if we were to go hard after Teixiera, which we would need to do.

Coco Crisp: We're going to talk about Jacoby Ellsbury in a second, he being the heir apparent to the vast expanse of Center Field at Fenway. Coco is not hitting. Yeah, he's starting to turn it around, which is good from a trade perspective. And he has a year left on his contract which means the team that got him would get the best year of his career next year (Contract year + Prime of Career + Something to Prove = SuperCoco!). The kicker is this: if Coco stays he will have to fight for his job next spring against Ellsbury who looks like a world-class baseball player at the AAA level. Why not ship him out of town? Move Drew back to Center and get Ellsbury (or Murphy/Moss if they want to coddle their burgeoning star) up to be the 4th outfielder behind Wily Mo in his audition to play DH somewhere else next year.

Craig Hansen: This guy is going to be either an All-Star setup man or one of the league's best closers. He just isn't going to do it in Boston. The Okajima/Papelbon combination looks like it has cemented itself in the 8th and 9th innings for the foreseeable future. Hansen is going to be highly prized, especially in Chicago for what he will bring to the table. I hate trading pitching, especially young pitching, but where Hansen does not fit, don't you have to use him to get that one extra piece that brings another world championship to Boston?

Clay Buchholz/Jacoby Ellsbury: These two are the futures of this franchise. They should be untouchable. In two years, Buchholz will be the best young starter in the league and Ellsbury will singlehandedly bring back the Go-Go Red Sox. Not even Buehrle and Teixiera would be worth losing either one of these guys.

And finally here are the trades I would like to see:

CHICAGO (AL) gets:
Coco Crisp
Craig Hansen
Abe Alvarez

BOSTON gets:
Mark Buehrle

or maybe...

TEXAS gets:
Mike Lowell/Coco Crisp
Craig Hansen
Abe Alvarez
David Murphy

BOSTON gets:
Mark Teixiera
Eric Gagne

or maybe...nothing at all.

Poached Lobster Is Not A Barbecue Food, There, I Said It.

2007-06-21T15:19:00.000-04:00

Ah yes, Top Chef is bringing the heat from week to week. Last night was no exception, as the contestants took their culinary wares out of doors for an upscale barbecue event. And for the most part, the chefs-in-waiting brought their "A" games. I thought the judges' decision on making Brian the winner of last night's challenge was on point, his seafood sausage hit all the high points needed, and fulfilled the expectations of the judges, as it was both upscale and barbecue appropriate. Sara Nguyen impressed as well, if only by accident, with her Vietnamese Ribeye creation. She definitely got a lot of points for accessibility of food, which can be of particular desirability when standing and mingling under the hot sun.

There were definitely some losers last night. Sandee, of course, was chief among them. Just because you manage to poach lobster on a grill does not mean it's barbecue food. As the other 13 contestants prove, there are myriad ways of finding new and interesting barbecue creations and textures and flavors. She chickened out or lost the plot, and deserved to get canned. But Howie and Joey were almost bigger problems. Howie lost more points with the judges on execution, this time not realizing that if you cut pork and leave it out, it will get dry and inedible. This man is a chef for crying out loud! He's not a line cook, he runs a kitchen. That kind of mistake is absolutely a failure of Culinary Skills 101. Joey on the other hand - who by the way, is the worst kind of New Yorker (the one who believes the world ends West of the Hudson, and for Joey, perhaps we shrink that to outside of Brooklyn) - made chicken wings! And not even good chicken wings, just run of the mill things he would make for a block party in Prospect Heights. These two have to raise their games immediately - though I don't think Joey can hack it - if they want to survive much longer.

One more note on Tre. He was brought to judges' table for a very good reason. They don't want him turning into Cliff. They don't want him to be another guy with a lot of promise and competitive drive, who gets a little bit to arrogant after some early victories. Tre is going to be there at the end, unless his head gets the better of him. He just needed a little spanking from the judges to clarify that.

YouTube + Presidential Candidate = Funny? Amazingly, Yes.

2007-06-20T00:12:00.000-04:00

Oh my god. Hillary Clinton brought the funny.

I am reminded of those heady days on the Dean campaign when we were trying to select our campaign song. We didn't do anything this witty. We just put a thread on the blog and asked people to post their favorites. My favorite response was to Christina Aguilera's "Fighter" to which a Deaniac said, "That girl gives me a sexual disease just by watching her on TV."

Yup, those were our supporters.

But this is not about me, or all of the cool stuff I've done. Let's get back to the Hillary video. I think it's a great send-up. Also, the Johnny Sac cameo was brilliant. I can only hope that her fellow candidates bring the funny as well as she did.

They should also present a policy program that can help America regain her role in the world, strengthen us at home, ensure our long-term prosperity, and such and such.

Dog Days

2007-06-19T14:27:00.000-04:00

The dull drudgery of work-a-day academia is starting to get to me. Don't get me wrong, I love my job, it affords me all kinds of time to do things like this, prattling on about nothing in particular. It also affords me the opportunity to continue my ridiculous, neverending and fruitless job search. (By the way, if any of you are hiring, or know someone who is...) But it's making me feel like I'm in a routine, and not one I want to be in.

I have to break it.

I started today with a large bucket at the driving range. But my life is starting to seem like one endless commute. Now, everyone reading this post who is employed just started playing the world's smallest violin for me. But it's true. All I do is drive back and forth to Medford (I mean, come on, frickin' MEDFORD!) to a boring job at a University I pretty much detest.

And yet, it's summer in New England. The trees are green, the sun is hot (occasionally) and the Red Sox are winning. What more do I need?

That's the problem. I just don't know.

Top Chef is Back. So am I.

2007-06-14T10:50:00.000-04:00

I haven't written in a month or so. Here's a quick update.

I went to the farm.

I went to New York.

I work everyday at Tufts.

I still do not have a rest of my life job.

Anyone who is still wondering why I haven't written anything recently, that's why. I'm just boring. However, Top Chef is never boring, and the new season kicked off last night with a bang. It is, as yet, hard to get a read on the competitors generally, because with fifteen of them going head to head last night in only an hour, only the best and the worst were memorable.

That said, I think it's obvious that the judges made the right decision last night. Sending Howie or Brian home over failures of executing on time were not warranted. They proved they can cook, maybe not win the show (although, if Howie pulls his act together, don't be surprised if he hangs around for a while), but at least be competitive.

What was plain and simple was that Clay was in WAY over his head. I mean, he was competing against the executive sous chef from Jean-F'ing-Georges! He fried a fish tail as the signature part of his meal. I'm surprised he didn't serve his ridiculously overdone and cold wild boar ribs with a side of grits from a box. Though, that may have added flavor and texture, which seemed to be missing from his dish. The bottom line is, that challenge was hard, but at least 10 other chefs rose to it. Clay, for reasons passing understanding, thought he could play it safe and move on. I mean, really, par-cooking wild boar? Really? Really.

Apart from Clay, everyone did very well with the challenge, though a few stood out as prohibitive favorites after week one.

Tre: Well, I mean, obviously. He won the challenge, both Ilan and Harold won the first challenge as well. He seems to have excellent chops - I was actually salivating when he plated that ostrich for the judges - and his competitive edge should help him ride the ups and downs of the competition. He probably won't rest on his laurels after his good first impression, and that should suit him well. If he continues to compete at this level, he will at least make the final, if not win.

Hung: He's Marcel's friend and colleague, so I am very cautious here. He also markets himself as a certified asshole, and nothing I saw last night would dissuade me of that notion. But the boy can cook. Unlike Marcel, he understands that incorporating molecular techniques into soulful cooking is where good avant garde food lies. Hung may set himself apart from the group both with his skills and attitude, and I wouldn't be at all surprised to see him survive for many a week.

Sara N.: The Jamaican-bred executive chef stood out for her tasty combinations in both the quickfire, which by the way, was really ridiculous, and probably threw a lot of people off, and at the judges' table. It remains to be seen just how far she can branch out from her Caribbean roots, but she seems quite well rounded. She may be a force to be reckoned with down the road.

Lia: Can you say ringer? She would probably have 3 Michelin Stars on principle if she ever opened her own restaurant. She is in a competition against people who are unsure of the concept of amuse-bouche. Watch out, even if she couldn't french her wild boar ribs correctly on the fly.

Micah: Of all the dishes prepared, her quickfire offering of "Sushi" Under the Tuscan Sun was the most appetizing. It was the perfect amuse-bouche: one bite, quirky, tasty. She probably didn't bring it as hard in the main challenge knowing she was safe. Amidst the Tres of the world here, she has to be careful about that. But if she can pull it together and be consistent, I believe her chops are just as good as anyone's and the fiery personality they allude to in the scenes from down the road may help her.

The Gates of Hell

2007-05-22T23:50:00.000-04:00

"You can stand me up at the gates of hell/But I won't back down"

- Tom Petty

Tonight, Dad and I ventured out to Yankee Stadium to see our beloved Red Sox take on the hated Yankees. Now, as neither one of us had ever been to the Toilet before, being in New York, we decided to avail ourselves of some day-of-game seats (we'll get back to that in a moment) and jump on the 4 Train and make the journey to Da Bronx. As the elevated train lurched toward the hulking beast on the East River, I mentioned to my father, "You ever feel like you were on a Landing Craft about to take Juno Beach?"

I didn't wear a hat, or a t-shirt or a jersey, or anything that would denote me as a member of the opposition. Although, had I done so, I would not have been alone. The first surprising thing to me was exactly how many Red Sox fans, in full regalia I might add, were there with us. In my section - Main Reserved 1, BEHIND HOME PLATE - there were at least 10 of us. And though we were, may times, drowned out by the drunken birthday party in the next row, we still got a few "Let's Go Red Sox" chants out with nary a battery thrown.

And from Manny's home run to Tavarez's effective pitching, throughout the game, I came to be even less enamored of Yankee fans than before. The "fans" in the expensive seats were just vindictive. I mean, I probably would be too if my team was getting its collective ass served up every night, and my owner was paying through the nose for team that probably won't win eighty games. The difference between me and the typical Yankee fan, however, is that I get the references I just made. They wouldn't. They also did not take kindly to our playful needling. Maybe it was because they were just rude, maybe it's because they can't exactly think of a comeback right now. But either way, when one slightly inebriated fan shouted "Hey, Coco Crisp, I ate you for breakfast today!" and thought highly of himself, I just let it go.

On the A train coming back to Times Square, I summed the evening up to my dad. "Well, now they can never say we didn't walk into the lion's den. And we also never have to do it again." I stood my ground. I watched my team win in a hostile environment. And I didn't back down.

Thirsty Thursday: 2005 Perrin Reserve, Cotes-du-Rhone, France

2007-05-10T22:10:00.000-04:00

Summer has come to New England. So it's time to start reviewing some lighter wines. These are wines you can enjoy on one of those lazy summer nights, when the sea air kicks up in the afternoon and cools down the heat of the day. Something to pop open on the porch with some grilled fish, or just in anticipation of the long, summer sunset. Tonight, we're featuring a rose. And it's in a screwcap bottle. But lord strike me down, it was good wine. Seriously, don't be afraid of pink wine. Except for white zin. If I catch you drinking that stuff, I'll hunt you down. Or just call you out on this blog, whichever is easier.

And now, on to the notes!

The bright strawberry nose mimics the beautiful light red color in the glass. The palate boasts light raspberry flavors which while not as tight or controlled as one might hope are still flavorful and lush, with just a touch of spice from the addition of syrah in the traditional regional blend. The light finish is reminiscent of a cool, calm summer night, with the flavors returning for a few seconds as the taste drifts off into the sunset.

Overall: 90, Purchased at Cape Ann Liquors, Gloucester, MA, $9.99

The End of the Beginning

2007-05-09T15:01:00.000-04:00

I walked out the door and as the hot New England sun glinted off my face I realized that there was to be no fanfare, no momentous feeling, none of that. It was a distinctly odd feeling, but rewarding all the same.

At 2pm this afternoon, I walked out of the Political Science department in Eaton Hall, having just dropped off my very last assignment to be completed in anticipation of my Bachelor of Arts degree at Tufts University. With that simple act, done on my way to work, I finished the five-year odyssey of college.

It didn't happen the way I always envisioned that it would. Graduation will take care of the pomp and circumstance, but all I had this afternoon was the knowledge that I had completed something, and done it well. There is a tendency to get sentimental at this time in a man's life, of challenges met, of obstacles overcome, and of a life ready to begin. But in this moment, knowing that work for the preparation for that life is complete, there is only satisfaction in a thing done well.

What's next?

Thirsty Thursday: 2002 Eos "The French Connection" (Proprietary Blend), Paso Robles, California

2007-05-03T19:03:00.000-04:00

I'm sorry I've been a blog delinquent lately. I've been busy trying to graduate from college. I'm in the midst of writing a 20-page paper, my very last assignment before getting a diploma, on the merits of regional integration in West Africa. With 9 pages already written, I'm settling down to watch Daisuke pitch at home and thought I'd pass on another wine review.

I actually picked this wine up last weekend, celebrating the completion of my two toughest exams of the semester. Okay, to be fair, only one of them was tough. But I still wanted to celebrate, and what I found with Eos was a smooth wine with lots of body and rich flavors.

Here are the notes:

Blackberries dominate the nose and remain a main feature on the palate. The fruit forward palate is rather languid, even subdued, with a lot of smoothness in the mouth. The fruit notes of raspberries and ripe cherries are lovingly accented by a taste of cedar. The finish is mild and smooth again with mint an more cedar flavors rounding out this very balanced wine.

Overall: 89, Purchased at Cambridge Wine and Spirits, Fresh Pond, Cambridge, MA, $19.99

It Was Blood

2007-04-27T10:02:00.000-04:00

Big news out of Red Sox Nation this week. No, it's not that we're in first place in a division that is getting rapidly weaker as our bats are coming out of their winter slumber, or the fact that The Dais-Man is making his first start at the Toilet tonight, or that Josh Beckett now has 5 wins from 5 starts. No, this week, we focused on whether Curt Schilling painted his sock in the 2004 ALCS to make it look like he was bleeding.

And why are focused on this "story?" Because new Orioles announcer Gary Thorne is a delightfully ignorant asshat who apparently couldn't pick sarcasm out of a crowded room with two hands and a flashlight. Thorne was chatting in the Red Sox clubhouse before yesterday's game with Doug "Cassus Belli" Mirabelli about summary topics which are probably not that interesting when Dougie Who Hits Bombs volunteered the "information" about the Sock which turned Schilling into both a baseball god and a folk hero.

Then, of course, every other ninny sportswriter, not having any copy to actually put in a paper yesterday, picked up the story and it blew out of control.

In response, Schilling has posted a reaction on his blog, 38 Pitches. Here's my favorite part:

"If you have the nuts, or the guts, grab an orthopedic surgeon, have them suture your ankle skin down to the tissue covering the bone in your ankle joint, then walk around for 4 hours. After that go find a mound, throw a hundred or so pitches, run over, cover first a few times. When you’re done check that ankle and see if it bleeds. It will."

I mean, how ballsy is that? Seriously. So, Gary Thorne, put that in your pipe and smoke it.

People are Creative (Or: Why I Love YouTube)

2007-04-21T12:30:00.000-04:00

The Mii Lebowski.

Hilarious.

Also, this is why I love Mystery Science Theater 3000:

Anyway, I'm off to the Sox-Yanks at Fenway. You can be relatively sure there'll be a post about it later. Hopefully not involving any Yankee fans running afoul of "Punch Sideiron" or "Big McLargehuge."

Thirsty Thursday: 2001 Paul Jaboulet Ainé, Beaumes-de-Venise, Côtes-du-Rhône Villages, France

2007-04-20T08:20:00.000-04:00

As we draw this exceptionally long and tiring week to a close, it's time for another wine review. I decided to go back to basics this week, and take a look at an affordable wine from one of the Motherland of Wine's oldest and most storied regions, the Rhone Valley.

Here are the notes.

Faint nose is met by a smooth palate, both of which are dominated by vanilla spice with fruit only barely noticeable. Good concentration of flavors after the wine opens up a little (at six years in the bottle and 14% alcohol, this wine will need 20 minutes or so before its drinkable...learned that lesson the hard way), but the astringent nature of the wine still tends to mask the flavors which seem overly soft. The finish is barely there, and seems to evaporate almost immediately.

Overall: 84, Purchased at Cambridge Wine and Spirits, Fresh Pond, Cambridge, MA. $11.99 on sale.

We Are Virginia Tech

2007-04-17T18:27:00.000-04:00

I wasn't able to catch all of today's convocation in Blacksburg, I had to work on a project for the balance of the afternoon. In one of my breaks, however, I flipped over to CNN's coverage just in time to hear Nikki Giovanni, the noted poet and English professor at Virginia Tech deliver an incredibly moving, and powerful work to the community gathered there. Let me put it this way, anytime you can make an arena full of people in the darkest depths of their mourning and shock and sadness stand up, clap their hands and affirm at the top of their lungs who they are, you're doing your job.

---

We are Virginia Tech. We are sad today, and we will be sad for quite a while. We are not moving on. We are embracing our mourning. We are Virginia Tech.

We are strong enough to stand tall tearlessly. We are brave enough to bend to cry, and sad enough to know we must laugh again. We are Virginia Tech. We do not understand this tragedy. We know we did nothing to deserve it. But neither does a child in Africa dying of AIDS. Neither do the invisible children walking the night away to avoid being captured by a rogue army.

Neither does the baby elephant watching his community being devastated for ivory. Neither does the Mexican child looking for fresh water. Neither does the Appalachian infant killed in the middle of the night in his crib in the home his father built with his own hands, being run over by a boulder because the land was destabilized.

No one deserves a tragedy. We are Virginia Tech. The Hokie nation embraces our own and reaches out with open heart and hand to those who offer their hearts and minds. We are strong and brave and innocent and unafraid. We are better than we think and not quite what we want to be.

We are alive to the imagination and the possibility we will continue to invent the future through our blood and tears, through all this sadness.

We are the Hokies.

We will prevail.

We will prevail.

We will prevail.

We are Virginia Tech.

Blacksburg

2007-04-16T19:09:00.000-04:00

We still don't know all the details of what happened this morning on the campus of Virginia Tech. What we do know is that this morning's incident was a tragedy of massive proportions that will affect this nation for years to come. The worst part may yet be, however, the thought that any of us in college could have been those students in Norris Hall.

We don't know, and it's easy to second guess the response of the University administration and police at this point without all the facts, but we do not know if this horror could have been prevented. College campuses are an open place, where young people come and go as they please, as they should. But that allows for the possibility that situations like today could take place. That someone acting alone could take over a building and empty a magazine of bullets and reign destruction and terror down upon innocent students.

And then reload.

And reload again.

And again.

But today is not a day to talk about campus security. Or gun control. Or the culture of cyclical violence in America. Those are important debates. And as this is America, we will have them. But we will have them tomorrow and the next day and beyond.

Today, we must remember the dead and help give strength to the living. Because they endured a scene of unimaginable terror, one that no one should ever face. My heart, and I hope those of all Americans and especially those of fellow students, is in Blacksburg tonight.

Thirsty Thursday: 2004 Kumkani Pinotage, Stellenbosch, South Africa

2007-04-06T10:47:00.000-04:00

Yes, I know it's Friday morning. But the title remains. If you're having lamb for Easter, this wine would be magnificent. Or, if you're just looking for something to sip on this cold New England weekend, this wine would do well in that endeavor as well. I wish I had discovered this wine while I was in South Africa, so that I could have visited the vineyard in Stellenbosch. Alas, I didn't, so I suppose I'll have to go back. Anyway, the notes:

The first thing I noticed about this wine was the excellent color concentration. Brilliant, shimmering maroon color in the glass with salmon ring when tipped. The nose and palate have delightful hints of raspberry and other summer berry flavors which add lightness to the earthy backbone of the Pinotage grape. The taste is well balanced across the palate, and the finish seems to linger for hours, as you bask in the warm glow of this light-bodied yet hearty wine.

Overall: 94, Purchased at Cambridge Wine and Spirits (formerly Mall Discount Liquors), Fresh Pond, Cambridge, $14.99.

XBox Hero (With Stars in My Eyes)

2007-04-05T11:31:00.000-04:00

I bought an XBox last night. It was an impulse buy, but I challenge any of you to not do the same thing. My roommate Jon's friend called him up, offering his XBox for $50 as he needed to buy some peripherals for his new Wii. Jon, being an idiot, passed on the offer. So I made it my business to jump at it.

Now, on the face of it, $50 for an XBox is a steal. But this ain't no ordinary XBox. No, the kid selling it is a tech guru who got the thing modified so that it has a 60GB hard drive which can download any XBox game on to it and have forever. It came packed with MVP Baseball 2005, Rugby 2005, Tony Hawk 3 and a bunch of other stuff. Oh yeah, and it has emulators so I can play games going back to old school Nintendo.

This purchase is one of, if not the best, I have ever made. And yes, I may never leave the house again.

For What It's Worth: A Final Four Preview

2007-03-31T10:12:00.000-04:00

I should mention right from the outset that if things don't go my way tonight, I will lose my Facebook pool to a guinea pig.

That's right, my asshat roommate decided to have some fun and have Mimosa, the house guinea pig, make selections for the NCAA Tournament. Now, some of Mimosa's picks were off base - she did have Oral Roberts in the Elite 8 - but a lot of them were on point. The crux of the discussion is this: Because I have terrible luck, and overthink almost all of my picks at Tournament time, if Ohio State wins tonight, I will lose to Mimosa. Here's to hoping that doesn't happen. So now, here's how the games breakdown, as I see it.

(2) Georgetown vs. (1) Ohio State

This game should be one for the ages. There are not two better matched teams in the entire tournament. And, it's the first game of the night, so the first half should be fairly slow, keeping the game close. It is going to be a battle of the big men, and we will see if both Greg Oden and Roy Hibbert can stay out of foul trouble. If that part of the game gets disrupted, Ohio State wins going away on the strength of guard play led by Mike Conley, Jr. However, I believe that Hibbert will have the presence of mind to play Oden close, perhaps even drawing a couple fouls off him, while staying out of trouble himself. That will allow him and Patrick Ewing, Jr. to control the tempo and Georgetown to eke out a close victory late in the game. And, seriously, I'm not just picking against the Guinea Pig.

Prediction: Georgetown 82, Ohio State 78.

(1) Florida vs. (2) UCLA

There are a lot of "if's" here for UCLA. IF Afflalo stays hot, and IF the inside game doesn't get too disrupted by Al Horford and Joakim Noah, and IF other guys can pick up the perimeter shooting, then UCLA is probably the best team in the country right now. However, IF one of those aforementioned possibilities doesn't come through, the Gators will win going away. The fact of the matter is that UCLA was overmatched against Kansas and came out on top, and IF that same team shows up tonight, they'll play for the national title on Monday. I believe that team will show and the Gators will - FINALLY! - be shut down.

Prediction: UCLA 71, Florida 65.

Brooklyn Pizza Gossip

2007-03-30T19:23:00.000-04:00

Last night, I had one of the great experiences of my life, and not only because it allowed to love Tufts University by hating Tufts University. Mike Doughty (which, if you are not familiar with his work by now, you, sir or madam, are simply not paying attention to me) graced Walnut Hill with his presence for the rather conspicuously titled "Jumbo Jam" held in Dewick-MacPhie Dining Hall.

That's right, one of the great poets and musicians of our generation, a man tortured by genius and drug abuse (though fastidiously living the clean life these days, and making better music for it) played in the very same place where I have been eating PB&J sandwiches to cure hangovers for the last five years. Concert Board, however, is some combination of Lo-Fi and Bush League. By the time Doughty, clad in what he described as a "clean" shirt, and old school DC kicks, and Andrew "Scrap" Livingston took the stage at 9:30 there were less than forty people in the room. This mostly due to the fact that Concert Board kept this show a closely guarded secret. Seriously, you wouldn't have known this show was even happening unless you happened to see the ONE advert they placed in the Tufts Daily. Their shortcomings were enunciated by a skeptical Doughty who took the stage and thanked us for the invite to "Jumbo Jam" informing us that since we brought the Jumbo, he would bring the Jam. Thank god he didn't phone it in.

The show opened with "Put It Down" one of Doughty's newest concoctions, a song which needed some tightening to be sure, but has a lot of promise. I can't wait to hear it on the new record. He and Scrap then launched into a grab bag of his greatest hits, reaching all the way back to Ruby Vroom with True Dreams of Wichita and later Janine, along with some of his solo greatness with selections like Thank You, Lord, For Sending Me The F Train and Madeline and Nine. The set was action packed and pleasing to the superfan like me, despite the fact that my demands for a rendition of "Firetruck" were not met.

But, it was after being asked where the rest of the band was that the show got real interesting. He made a joke that Scrap had eaten them. Now, this joke brought in a new wrinkle. Doughty had mentioned several time on his blog (which is linked on the blogroll) that he and his bandmates - including the aforementioned man of mystery, Mr. Livingston - enjoyed the pizza at Brooklyn institution DiFara's. In the course of my blog reading last week, I came upon an article at SliceNY saying that DiFara's had been shut down, apparently for health code violations. It later turned out those violations had to do with rat feces being found in the food prep area. Anyway, cut back to the show, James decides to shout to the stage, in reply to the Scrap eating the band joke that Scrap was hungry because he couldn't get a slice at DiFara's as it was closed. Doughty laughed, and said "No, I think it's open." At this point, since no one else in the room was really paying attention, Mike Doughty and I start having a conversation. It is reproduced below, in its entirety:

Me: "Oh, really? Did they reopen it?"

Doughty: "What? RE-open?"

Me: "Yeah, the Board of Health shut it down."

Doughty: (obviously shocked and horrified) "WHAT!?!?"

Me: "Yeah, two weeks ago."

(Insert a very uneasy look between Scrap and Doughty here)

Doughty: (realizing the audience is still in the room) "Ladies and Gentlemen, I'm sorry, I need to engage in some Brooklyn pizza gossip."

We then agreed we would talk more about it after the show.

So, when Doughty was done with his masterful set, punctuated by Looking at the World From The Bottom of the Well, James and I stuck around to give him more information about DiFara's. He was agog to learn. Scrap was mortified, saying to me "I eat there like every day when I'm in Brooklyn." And Doughty informed me that he would google the incident as soon as he got back to Brooklyn.

Anyway, that was my brush with fame. I shook both their hands and thanked them for a great set as they headed back to Brooklyn to celebrate Scrap's daughter, Larry, and her birthday. In a way, I feel like I know what it must have been like for Bernie Gilmore, my old College Bowl advisor, when, at Yale in the early '80s, informed a young woman on the quad that President Reagan had been shot. That young lady was Jodie Foster, the object of affection for John Hinckley, and the point behind his rampage.

In any case, it was a great show. Zox followed. They were really terrible. And Concert Board made me remember why I hate this university so very, very much.

Dropping the Ball

2007-03-30T13:19:00.000-04:00

I'm going to have a much longer post later today (or tomorrow...or something) about what I did last night. Needless to say, it was AMAZING! But you will hear more about this later. Right now I need to focus some anger on Major League Baseball.

A story posted on Boston.com this morning shows why the organization of baseball has gone completely beyond the pale. Johnny Pesky, the man who actually embodies what it means to be a Boston Red Sox, a man who waited literally his entire life - he was born in 1919 - to see his team win a World Series, a man who has given his life to our Nation, is being barred by Major League Baseball from wearing a uniform and sitting in the dugout.

I still get tears in my eyes when I watch the video of Johnny Pesky, sitting in the clubhouse watching Keith Foulke stab a grounder from Edgar Renteria, and underhand it to Doug Mientkiewicz to bring the World Championship to Boston for the first time in 86 long years. Pesky himself had suffered the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune. For years, he was blamed - unjustly - for double-clutching on the relay throw which might have gotten Enos Slaughter at the plate and saved the Red Sox' chances of winning the 1946 World Series. He has spent literally the rest of his life making it up to Red Sox Nation. He hits fungoes in Spring Training. He is a mentor to young players, a skill which is invaluable even in today's game. And for years he has been the face of the organization.

Major League Baseball needs to get its head out of its ass on this one. They have been trying to get Pesky out of the dugout for years to little or no avail. The man is 88 years old. He should be treated like a national treasure for what he has done with his life, not given the bum's rush in the name of "rules and regulations."

P.S. I know I didn't do a wine review this week. My apologies.

Thirsty Thursday: 2005 Oyster Bay Pinot Noir, New Zealand

2007-03-22T18:11:00.000-04:00

Well I have returned from New York to the friendly confines of Hillsdale Road in Medford and it's time for your weekly wine review. Usually I enjoy sitting back on a Thursday night, the bulk of my week's work at an end, and enjoy a fine glass of wine. Tonight however will be dominated by basketball and beer, so we're turning back the clock to Tuesday night when Luke, Jill, Megan and I watched American Idol at Luke's Upper East Side apartment with a few bottles of wine purchased around the corner. We decided not to keep Luke's usual tradition of wine drinking, and not break the bottle open on the street and drink with the hobos. Instead, we gathered around the old plasma screen with a bottle of NZ Pinot and watch Sanjaya caterwaul and make little girls cry, while we all sat gnashing our teeth in disbelief. Anyway, on to the review:

This wine was disappointing, as I'd heard a lot recently about Pinot gaining strength down under. Instead, we were met with a limp, flavorless offering with very few redeeming qualities. The nose was light and airy with barely a hint of berry flavors. The palate tastes were flat and disjointed with overbearing sensations of terroir. The finish was nearly non-existent and did not add anything the character of the wine.

Overall: 82, Purchased at Vintage Grape, 2nd Avenue at 84th Street, New York City, $15

Mitt Romney: Buffoon

2007-03-19T22:13:00.000-04:00

This lovely chestnut comes to us from the Miami Herald about the esteemed jackass former Governor of the Commonwealth Mitt Romney and his halting attempts to run for Vice President. It seems that in a speech given to the right-wing fanatical Cuban-American population of Miami, Romney closed his remarks by saying, "Patria o muerte, venceremos," a phrase which roughly translates to "Fatherland or death, we shall overcome."

Now, of course, just on the basis of sheer ridiculousness, this one takes the cake. However, even better than the prima facie explanation, Romney tried to explain his choice of words as speaking out against Venezuelan strongman leader Hugo Chavez who has co-opted the phrase to his own ends. Romney explained that this aggression cannot stand and that the phrase really belongs to the Cubans who are fighting against Castro.

And, of course, that statement is completely, 100% false. "Patria o muerte, venceremos: is the popular phrase that Castro has closed his rambling orations with for the last half-century as a means of coalescing his power base. So not only is Mitt Romney an idiot, but he cannot even read, write or listen to speeches. Which, unfortunately, as he is a member of the GOP, qualifies him to be President of the United States.

Noo Yawk, Quick Thoughts

2007-03-19T18:31:00.000-04:00

Some people go to bright, sunny locales for Spring Break, surrounding themselves with beautiful people sunbathing amidst crystal blue waters and such. For me, I was just happy that they cleared the storm drains in the New York by this morning so my feet could finally be dry as I went for a morning walk on 5th Avenue. Anyway, I don't have a full post here, so here are some quick hits from my extended weekend in the Big Apple.

- Obviously, first, I have to talk about the NCAA Tournament. Not exactly March Madness (unless you count the half hour of excitement on Saturday night with Vandy and Pitt). There were about 45 boring games last weekend, and all we learned (and, to be fair, I spent a lot of time roaming around NYC and not enough time watching hoops, so I may not be the most informative critic here) was that the Tournament is still up for grabs. Sure, I've got Kansas, but that's not a sure bet, as good as they looked whipping a bad Kentucky team yesterday. None of the #1 seeds looked dominant in their two wins over the weekend. Ohio State BARELY survived against a really, really, really bad Xavier team, while nearly giving Gus Johnson a simultaneous heart attack/sportsgasm. So pay attention next weekend, we'll see if any more secrets of the hardwood get revealed.

- I was very disappointed in the Holy Cross loss to SIU Friday night. I really thought the 'Saders had what it took to go on a little George Mason-esque run. Didn't get a chance to see the game, thanks to the magnificently intoxicated Villanova fans at the Waterloo Pub on 2nd Avenue who refused to give up 1 of the 5 TVs that were tuned to the Kentucky-'Nova yawner. Thanks guys. P.S., Need a cheap drink on the Upper East Side? Go to the Waterloo. The decor ain't much and the clientele are not exactly New York's chicest, but Luke, Megan and I got rip-roaringly tipsy on some brews and delightfully heavy drinks and got change back from $50. For all of us. Marvelous.

- Besides basketball, I've been culturing up this weekend. Spent a glorious day with Megan yesterday exploring the Met, then had a nice walk this morning to the MoMA and back up to the Guggenheim today. All three are, of course, impressive. I must say I was quite taken with the sometimes-maligned new MoMA, but then, I like modernism more than a lot of people. It was nice to see works like Les Desmoiselles d'Avignon, Onement 1, and Mondrian's Compositions up close and personal. The Met, too, was fun. I hadn't been there since my early childhood, and it was fun to go back and see Emanuel Leutze's rendition of Washington Crossing the Delaware, if for no other reason than that it reminded me of the first joke my mom ever told me. I was three years old and thought it was the height of comedy. The thing is, it's still funny. I'll leave you to ponder on its hilarity.

"What did George Washington say to his men before crossing the Delaware?"

"Get in the boat."

Timeless.

Thirsty Thursday: 2005 Layer Cake Shiraz, Australia

2007-03-15T22:50:00.000-04:00

I'm taking a (very) short break from NCAA tournament action to do the weekly wine review.

Ok, but first, full disclosure: I ended up switching my pick on tonight's game to VCU over Duke. And for once, I couldn't be happier that Duke lost. VCU stayed with them all game and deserved to win after DeMarcus Nelson INEXCUSABLY forced a score too early on their final legitimate possession and left the door open for Eric Maynor (who, by the way, is a total stud with NBA potential) to hit the game winning shot from the stripe.

Anyway, tonight I have selected Layer Cake Shiraz for the review. And I chose it for a very specific reason: it's a screwcap wine. DO NOT BE AFRAID! Wine in a bottle with a screwcap does not necessarily mean you are getting plonk. In fact, some of the world's finest wines are converting to screwcaps (and even, dear God, boxes). So let tonight be a lesson, just because you don't need a wine tool to open it, doesn't mean the wine won't be above average, as indeed tonight's selection was. And with that, on to the notes!

Lovely chocolate and white pepper on the nose are met with a velvety smooth coffee and fresh fall spice dominated palate. The finish seems to linger for days and leaves no impression that this wine, young as it is, is 14.5% alcohol by volume. The wonderful tastes are further accented by the layered textures and flavors of this tight, concenrated wine.

My rating: 94, Purchased at Mall Discount Liquors, Cambridge, $14.99

It's The Most Wonderful Time of The Year

2007-03-11T21:47:00.000-04:00

There is no day like today. Ok, maybe opening day of the baseball season, but really Selection Sunday carries an incredible sense of anticipation. 65 teams have been handed their tickets to the ball. A few of them will have the Cinderella experience, their dreams kept alive, others will have their runs cut short, their dreams crushed. And all of it transpiring in front of a nation, enraptured by it all.

But what did we learn today? Here are some major storylines.

1) The Syracuse snub is pretty much beyond the pale. They deserved a #6 seed (probably the one that Duke got, but I'll get to that in a minute) at worst, especially the way they have been playing the last few weeks before slipping up in the Big East tournament. No way Xavier, from the biggest joke of a conference this side of the Southland, deserved to get into this tournament. Or Stanford for that matter. Sure, their pre-conference schedule was its usual Big East-style easy pickings, and most of its big wins came at the Carrier Dome, but the win over Georgetown at the end of the regular season most assuredly should have guaranteed the 'Cuse a spot amongst the 65. The Committee really blew it.

2) A lot of you know I'm a HUGE Duke fan. And for obvious reasons, they're winners with a great coach in Mike Kryszewski and a storied history. But this year's team pales in comparison to teams from the past. I hate saying it, but they simply did not deserve the high #6 seed they got. They're overranked by virtue of their history, not the recent past. They were terrible down the stretch and had no opportunity to show their wares in the ACC tournament by virtue of running into a driven and very well-coached NC State. As you'll see in the breakdown, I have a hard time believing this team will get past VCU in the first round (even if I am still picking them).

3) A lot of people are disagreeing with Texas being ranked at #4. However, if you take Kevin Durant out of the equation, Texas is maybe, MAYBE, a 15-win team. Abrams and Augustin do not a contender make. Durant is a difference maker to be sure, his 37 points against Kansas today were scored in about 15 good minutes, but he cannot carry the load for 40 minutes night in and night out. They deserved to be a protected seed, but to me, #4 is right.

4) As an aside, watch out for Kansas. For once, Rock, Chalk, Jayhawk might actually be dangerous.

5) Finally, the one thing the Committee got right were the #1 seeds. Florida, Ohio State, Kansas, and, sadly, UNC, are the best teams in the nation.

And now, let's take a more in-depth look at the brackets.

MIDWEST REGION (St. Louis)

Florida received the overall #1 seed in the tournament by virtue of their recent play and their returning starters from last year's championship run. They had a shaky middle part of the season, but if their SEC tournament run is any indication of how they will fare, Florida is nearly a shoe-in for the Final Four and has an edge over the better part of the field. However, SEC teams have a tendency to be oversold in the run-up to the Big Dance, and Florida is no exception. Also, they most likely will not be tested until the Regional Final, when they will most likely be playing Pac-10 Champion Oregon, who have not been getting enough press. So while the Midwest on paper could be setup for a Florida run, don't be so sure.

1st Round Upset special: Winthrop over Notre Dame
Sleeper: Georgia Tech
Game to Watch: Sweet 16, Oregon vs. Georgia Tech
Regional Champion: Oregon over Florida

WEST REGION (San Jose)

The West region seems to be the least competitive of the four regions, with Kansas primed for a run to the Final Four. They certainly impressed me coming back from 22 down in the first half against Texas in today's Big 12 Championship. They are an incredibly deep team with the ability to slam their game into a whole other realm when challenged. A probable Sweet 16 date with Virginia Tech and/or Regional Final matchup with UCLA could prove thorny, but Kansas looks to be on another level going into the Dance.

1st Round Upset Special: Holy Cross over Southern Illinois (and, MAYBE, VCU over Duke)
Sleeper: Virginia Tech
Game to Watch: Second Round, Duke vs. Pittsburgh
Regional Champion: Kansas over UCLA

EAST REGION (Meadowlands)

North Carolina survived an impassioned run by the Wolfpack to win the ACC tournament earlier today. With 7 teams entering the field of 65 from the ACC, this was one of the better years in recent memory for College Basketball's best and most competitive power conference. The masked wonder Tyler Hansbrough and company are poised for a deep run, but the East Region should provide some remarkable game action all the way to Atlanta. Watch out for sleepers in this region especially, this year's George Mason could be making a run through East Rutherford.

1st Round Upset Special: Arkansas over USC
Sleeper: Vanderbilt
Game to Watch: Sweet 16, Vanderbilt vs. Georgetown
Regional Champion: North Carolina over Vanderbilt

SOUTH REGION (San Antonio)

This entire region is a toss-up. Ohio State looks strong, but Big 10 teams are always eminently beatable at Tournament time, so I am wary of picking them too deep. The #2 seed Memphis is a joke and will get upset by the second round. All respect to John Calipari, but this team is not UMass in 1995. They come from a mid-Major conference and had ZERO challenges in their pre-conference schedule. At 3, 4 and 5, Texas A&M, Virginia and Tennessee are all a little green, though Bruce Pearl may be able to work some magic with the Vols, so look out for them.

1st Round Upset Special: Your guess is as good as mine. Don't be shocked if Creighton or North Texas pull it off.
Sleeper: Tennessee
Game to Watch: Sweet 16, Ohio State vs. Tennessee
Regional Champion: Tennessee over Texas A&M

FINAL FOUR (Atlanta)

Kansas over Oregon, North Carolina over Tennessee.

NATIONAL CHAMPIONSHIP

Kansas 87, North Carolina 74. Rock, Chalk, Jayhawk.

Hypocrisy In Government? It's Spelled G-I-N-G-R-I-C-H

2007-03-08T21:57:00.000-05:00

Oh, this is too good to pass up.

As awful and revolting as the idea of Newt Gingrich having sex is, he was having it. With a woman. Who was not his wife. Not news, you say? Here's the kicker:

The affair took place while that loudmouthed jackass was on every media outlet within ear and eyeshot of the American people, castigating the President of the United States, Bill Clinton, for having an illicit affair of his own.

I mean, just, can you even possibly be serious anymore? These people have officially lost their minds. I thought "Conservapedia" (where, when we don't like the facts, we change 'em) would the most ridiculous Conservative-related item of the week. But, oh Newtie, you came and you gave without taking...

Good luck running for President yourself, you consummate jackass.

Thirsty Thursday: 2005 Firesteed Pinot Noir

2007-03-08T19:28:00.000-05:00

Ok, so first a disclaimer. I know I said I would do this as a regular feature. And I really did mean it. However, the last time we met in this space to talk wine, there was a rather unfortunate incident. See, I was typing away, minding my own business, tasting some nice (if young, as you'll remember) French wine, when the unthinkable happened. I managed, heroically, to spill a small quantity of wine on my keyboard. The trusted iBook is luckily none the worse for ware (after a quick keyboard replacement to the tune of $130), but I was still a little gun shy about keeping wine near my pride and joy. However, tonight I decided to throw caution to the wind and enjoy some fine Oregon Pinot Noir. I also decided I should drink it away from the computer. How very low-fi.

And now, on to the tasting notes!

Bright, ruby color in the glass is met with strawberries and cherries on the nose, accompanied by some faint earth tones. Lovely fruit on the forward palate is concentrated with very low acidity. Hard cheese taste on the long, lingering finish which completes the very balanced nature of the wine.

My rating: 91. Purchased at Downtown Wine and Spirits, Davis Square, Somerville, $17.

Bye, Scooter

2007-03-06T12:11:00.000-05:00

I. Lewis "Scooter" (and, really, to whomever gave him that moniker, the thanks of a grateful nation be upon you) Libby, former chief counselor to Vice President, and Commander in Chief of the Army of Darkness, Richard B. "Dick" Cheney, is going for an extended stay to Club Fed. Possibly for thirty years, but at least until he is pardoned by President George W. "W" Bush when the heat dies down. Libby, of course, became the sacrificial lamb in the CIA Leak case in which Ambassador Joe Wilson's hot, hot, CIA operative wife, Valerie Plame, was outed as such by the administration, and subsequently lost her job as a covert agent. What we learned from the verdict, however, is that while the administration has lost a lot of legislative power in the face of the past mid-term elections, they are still very adept at protecting the chief architects of this sham of a government when push comes to shove. So for those of you who would like to see this administration crash and burn through impeachment or what have you, remember: they always find someone just low enough on the food chain to take the fall and keep them out of the shit.

Anyway, Scooter, enjoy your time away. Perhaps you can work on another lewd, ridiculous novel about skiing or whatever it is that you do. Also, don't forget, it's shank or be shanked.

You Make The Call

2007-03-05T00:09:00.000-05:00

So I'm reminded tonight of these old commercials they used to run during football games in the 1980s. The premise would be that they would show some kind of interesting play from an earlier game, one with a disputed call, and then give the audience a couple of options on how the play should have been called by the referees on the field. Then they would break for another 10 seconds or so and hock some product (it may have been Budweiser, but I honestly can't remember) then come back and tell you what happened. All in good fun. Sometimes these plays had two possible outcomes and you had to chose the crazier, zanier one, which was usually how the play was called. To wit, I provide you with two "real-life" (read: Hollywood) situations from over the weekend, and try to answer which wacky scenario takes the cake.

1) Britney Spears' latest attempt at rehab which abruptly ended with her screaming "I am the anti-christ!" and feigning a try at suicide before publicly begging the Distinguished Gentleman, Mr. Federline, to re-marry her and make him a baby daddy once again.

2) On the subject of satanic spawn, Ann Coulter opened her mouth again this weekend, when, over the deafening cries of the misbegotten which follow that wench around whenever she tries to speak, she managed, somehow, to drop the F-Bomb on John Edwards at some Conservative event.

That's right, America, tell us who the biggest loser is. YOU Make the Call!

And now a message from our sponsor:

(This is the part where I openly thank City Slicker Cafe for posting my musings about the Shrimp and Bacon Pizza in their fine establishment. Kudos to you for singling me out and spreading the word about this blog. I'll be in to collect my free lifetime supply of pizzas soon...)

And now, America decides as YOU Make the Call.

The answer of course, is that we are all sad and disgusting people for lending any sort of credence to this claptrap. Both Britney Spears and Ann Coulter should just go away. We should stop listening to them, or caring about them. And thus, like all shebeast celebutantes of Hollywood and Washington, they will soon fade into our collective memories.

At least, we can hope...

Mike Doughty Brings Us The New Hotness. Again.

2007-02-26T18:58:00.000-05:00

If you're not reading Super Special Questions and listening to the music of Mike Doughty, it's about damn time you start. If you are reading it, then you would have seen today's long update post (he's into that recently) about his preparations for the Knitting Factory show (which, alas, I am not going to), his forthcoming trip to Berlin, the songwriting process for his next album which cannot come soon enough, and relinking with Andrew "Scrap" Livingston, international man of mystery. In and of itself, a great post.

But contained in the bottom of the text were some recommendations from Doughty. First, that we should all see that German movie that won the Best Foreign Film Oscar last night. More importantly, however, he introduces us to Sean Hayes, an independent singer-songwriter from San Francisco. I just downloaded his latest two albums, "Big Black Hole and Little Baby Star" and "Alabama Chicken" from iTunes, and let me tell you, I don't think I've heard downbeat folkrock this good since I heard Damien Rice's "O" way back on the campaign trail. Hayes released these two albums on his own label and has lent his personal touch to them. Stirring arrangements are accompanied by his haunting vocals, a cross between the aforementioned Rice, Amos Lee (who, also, if you're not listening to him, you're worse off for it) and, at times, Thom Yorke. All the while, Hayes incorporates the country sensibility he learned growing up in North Carolina into a very mature, folky, unique sound.

In short, go buy these albums now. And enjoy them.

You can thank me (and Doughty) later.

No, You're Right, Of COURSE Strom Thurmond's Family Owned Al Sharpton's Ancestors As Slaves. This Makes Perfect Sense.

2007-02-25T13:39:00.000-05:00

If this is a joke, it is the funniest joke I have ever heard. If it's not, and it is in fact true, then it is the funniest thing I have ever heard, period. I've linked the article, but here is the crux of it:

Strom Thurmond's Great-Great Grandfather owned slaves, much as the younger Thurmond (which, I'm sure the late, great racist gentleman from South Carolina has not been called in a VERY long time) would have liked to do in his own life. One of those slaves was a man named Coleman Sharpton. And yes, you guessed it, Coleman Sharpton is a direct ancestor of the one, the only, Rev. Al Sharpton.

I mean, can you conceive of a more hilarious circumstance than this? I'm thinking about writing a sitcom about it, for christ's sake.

DJ

2007-02-23T09:51:00.000-05:00

Dennis Johnson died last night. He was 52. It's almost ironic, because I had spent a goodly portion of this week thinking about Dennis Johnson specifically, and the '86 Celtics in general. You know, the Pats are done for the year and the Red Sox won't start ramping up until next week, so my mind wanders, inevitably, to the glory days of the past in Boston sports. Also, NBATV (the newest hotness) has been showing NBA's Greatest Games from 1986 a lot lately. I forgot how truly stacked that team was. Bird, McHale, Parish, Ainge, and DJ. All 5 of them all-stars. All 5 of them (as Bill Simmons writes today in his elegy for Johnson, which you all should read, because he'll say this much better than I ever could) SHOULD be Hall of Famers. Of course, Johnson will get there, but now it will be only in memoriam for the great player he was.

Anyway, read Simmons, because he breaks this down much better, but the one thing people forget is how DJ's greatest play (of many great instinctive plays he made over his career) is completely overshadowed by a Legend and a call. Watch it below.

Remember plays like this one when the Celtics next stink out the joint against Golden State or some damn thing. In any case, thanks DJ, you provided the Celtic faithful with many, many great moments. And you will be missed.

Shrimp. Bacon. Pizza. Heaven.

2007-02-21T14:35:00.000-05:00

I openly wept at the sight of it.

About six months ago, as many of you may know, the culinary bastion of goodness known as Urban Gourmet burned in a tragic fire which left all of us who loved the venerable greasy spoon, and had elevated it to an almost cult-like status, shocked and saddened. Over the weekend, I received word that the owners had pooled their resources into a new location, which they dubbed City Slicker Cafe. As they were closed Sunday and Monday, I had to wait a few more days until last night to renew my love for Urban. But, oh boy, the wait was more than worth it.

I put in my order at around 6pm after my torturous Postmodernism class wrapped up late and I got books from Tisch for my paper due on Thursday. The last six Urbanless months had prepared me for the final wait, but I still kept bouncing my leg while staring at the clock in anticipation. When the doorbell rang, I (quite literally) bolted out of my chair to the door and received my pizza, now dubbed the Surf 'n' Turf by City Slicker. Running back to the couch, I didn't even wait to get a plate or a glass of milk or anything. I put the box down on the ottoman and opened it. And stared.

Honestly, pizza, or really food of any kind, should not make me do this. But there I sat, in awe of the beauty which sat smoldering in front of me. It was just as I remembered: thick, flaky crust, lush toppings, bubbling cheese. I admired for a minute what I had so long desired. And then I took my first, breathless bite.

The taste was just as I remembered. Buttery and soft, the shrimp and bacon flavors dancing across my palate, all the while thinking, "if there is a god, and he ordered a pizza, it would be this."

I ate six slices and I didn't care that that made me a fatass. It was worth it. Because when a man thinks he's lost his favorite pizza forever, there's nothing in the world like getting it back.

Thirsty Thursday: 2005 Chateau Clos de la Chesnaie, Lalande de Pomerol

2007-02-15T22:35:00.000-05:00

Welcome to a new feature over here at Theory in Practice. Each Thursday night, as the college weekend and drinkathon begins, I'll be posting tasting notes for a new wine each week, both to continue my lovable but pompous ranting and to help educate you, dear reader, on the wonderful world of wine.

We begin this week with a 2005 Chateau Clos de la Chesnaie, a Bordeaux blend of Merlot and Cabernet Sauvignon. Oenophiles have been holding their collective breath in anticipation of the wonders the 2005 Bordeaux vintage will unleash, and we are just now getting our first peek into the peak of the world's best known wine region. Scholars wonder whether 2005, with great vintages like 2000 and 2003 barely in the rear-view mirror, will gain that most sought-after title of reknowned year in Bordelaise history. Futures have skyrocketed, and the world's collectors have begun snapping up the best. But for me, the small quaffer, and thousands like me, we may still experience that perfection of a confluence of events so rare as to create memories for years to come. There are wonderful, accessible Bordeaux wines still out there, so get searching!

And now on to the tasting. Earth tones and lovely Merlot berry flavors on the nose, tempered with just hint of smoke and oak. Rather astringent in the mouth, even after aerating, but with a flourish of strawberry and black cherries. Finish is very acidic, clearly the wine needs much more time to mellow in the bottle.

Overall: 87 now, 89-91 at peak. $14.99 on sale at Mall Discount Liquors, Cambridge, MA

'Bosch is Better

2007-02-11T14:43:00.000-05:00

Though I am still in the recovery process from yesterday's Boston Wine Expo, I have a few quick thoughts on the dazzling event, and some comparisons to my favorite wine event, the Stellenbosch Wine Festival.

First of all, event hough they say it opens at 1pm, we clearly needed to be there well before that. Unfortunately, James and I were detained at his house trying to buy Red Sox opening day tickets (we didn't get them, got Yankee tickets for April 21st instead) and didn't leave Cambridge until 12:30. Nevertheless, as we exited the Silver Line stop at World Trade Center station at 1pm on the nose, the gathering herd had...well, gathered. The line stretched in a serpentine fashion all the way out past the Seaport Hotel. And that was just the line to get into a another line to get your ticket taken! The entire process took more than a half an hour. Luckily, it was rather a warm day and we were appropriately dressed.

When we arrived inside the hall, the sheer magnitude of the event captivated us. Acre upon acre of wine, wine-related products, and food splayed out in front of us. We didn't know where to begin. After 10 minutes trying to find the coat check, which we never found until about an hour and a half later, when it was full, we decided to make our first tasting experiences in the Sonoma County booths, starting with Ravenswood Sonoma County Old Vines Zinfandel 2004. I much prefer the Mendocino County Zin by Ravenswood, which is not to say their Sonoma County offering is bad - it's not, it was actually some of our favorite wine of the day - but it will definitely benefit from more time in the bottle. From Sonoma County, we made our way to the South African wines, tasting some Haute-Cabriere Pinotage, a Franschhoek favorite, as well as Diemersdal Pinotage from Durbanville, which I well remembered sharing with Caitlin over mussels at Theo's in Camps Bay. After the stroll down memory lane, we made our way to the Sake booth, which was surprisingly unpopular. Of course, this allowed James to talk about his favorite Sake pairings - "I like to pair with an ice cold Kirin Ichiban, placing the Sake at the bottom and drinking rapidly" - but also allowed us to sample some very fine wine. The exhibitor there was also the best of the day by far. He really knew about the process and clearly loved explaining it to wine people who many times do not give Sake its due. Their unfiltered offering, Kikusui Funaguchi, was my favorite, a viscous, cloudy and rich tasting offering in a can which checks in at 19% alcohol by volume.

After our first round of tasting, having made our towards the celebrity chef kitchens, we started walking through the food displays, enjoying many new treats along the way. However, after about 15 minutes we decided food would not get us drunk, so it was right back to the tasting floor. By now, at about 2:30, the hall was packed with wine people. It was also during this period that many of the serious wine writers, tradesmen and true oenophiles were making their rounds. Which, of course, means they were hogging up all the good tables wanting to talk about esoterica with the merchants. We did manage to slip into some smaller places along the way, however, including the intriguing Clos de Lachance, a small, single-vineyard winery in the Santa Cruz Mountains of Central California. Their "hummingbird series" zinfandel and syrah had clearly benefited from the careful handling of a small vintner's touch. After this visit to California, we jumped over to Portugal and indulged in some very big, bold and fruit-forward wines. My favorite was the Ferreira 10-Year Tawny Port, with wonderfully rich fruit and oak flavors that seemed to linger for almost half an hour after tasting. Certainly made me want to visit Portugal for real and sample some contemporaries.

Much of the rest of the afternoon was spent tasting American wines, which but for MacRostie's fantastic Pinot Noir and the Central Coast Zinfandel offering from Pietra Santa Winery, were less than thrilling. In all, James and I guessed we tasted around 75-100 wines in less than three hours, which made the cold walk back slightly more bearable. Nonetheless, while impressive and large, the Boston Wine Expo pales in comparison to the stellar Stellenbosch affair. Now, of course, it is a much different type of wine celebration, with the best of the best from across the world gathered here in Boston, while Stellenbosch is a celebration of one region, however formidable. Still, I much prefer the smaller celebrations in that we could taste our way through the entire region and really get a sense of it. With a lack of a clear strategy in Boston, we sort of found ourselves all over the map, so to speak, and while we certainly had some dizzying highs, they were fewer and further between. There was also a much more rushed feel to the Boston event. With only three hours to taste and 1800 wines available, we ended up having to make choices based on availability and timing, much more than in Stellenbosch. It was a much more closed in feel to be sure. Finally, and I believe most regrettably, for whatever reason, there was no way to buy any of the wines we sampled at the Wine Expo. At Stellnbosch, when we finished tasting after four or so hours, we could go into the shop pick up the ones we liked then retire to the field behind the Paul Roos Centre and in the shadows of the mountains drink sundowners and relax. In Boston, when we were done tasting, the event was over, no room to further discuss what we found or enjoy some spoils of tasting. Still, the event, while certainly more of a trade show than a festival, is worth every penny to go to in order to beef up your education about wine.

Bourdain is God, God is Bourdain. The Two Are One.

2007-02-09T15:49:00.000-05:00

A lot of you know of my fascination and utmost respect for Chef-Hero, Anthony Bourdain. I mean, after all, this is the man who truly spurred my own desire to cook and has made cooking a soulful pursuit again. He is also one of my favorite writers, with a talent for description of even the most mundane things, both in and out of the kitchen, sublime. In a guest post over at Ruhlman.com, he takes the Food Network to task for its current crop of celebrity chefs. Those of you who have read his seminal work, Kitchen Confidential, know of Bourdain's distaste for the entire idea of the celebrity chef - though, of course, he has become one along the way, albeit with a style unmatched in the industry. Here, he essentially bemoans the loss of the soul of cooking, a soul which he, himself, has been credited with saving over the last decade at Les Halles, and as he lamented in an earlier guest post about this year's Top Chef. As always, Bourdain's musings are spot on. Read and enjoy. Also, if you haven't read Kitchen Confidential, The Nasty Bits or any other of Bourdain's earlier work, go to Amazon and buy them now.

Marry Me, Speaker Pelosi

2007-02-06T18:23:00.000-05:00

Check out this link from the Corpus Christi Caller. On the official House Democrats Events Calendar, there is a notation on February 11:

Dick Cheney Hunting Incident (2006).

Amazing.

The Best Super Bowl Ad of 2007

2007-02-05T09:50:00.000-05:00

Peyton won his damn Super Bowl. I don't even want to talk about it.

So, instead, let's talk about the game within the game: advertising! The King Pharmaceuticals ad for beatyourrisk.com notwithstanding (shameless plug: Megan's company came up with the storyboards...it was the one where the heart gets attacked by all the things that can hurt it and so on...watch it here), the best advertisements, in my opinion, always feature Robert Goulet.

Emerald Nuts is always good for a laugh and this year they did not disappoint. I know I'll be on the lookout for Robert Goulet the next time I'm feeling sleepy at the office.

Meh...: A Super Bowl Post

2007-02-02T15:32:00.000-05:00

It took the NFL almost twenty years, but they have accomplished the unthinkable. They have made me not care at all about watching the Super Bowl. There are no interesting subplots. There is no interesting pretext. The teams are not that fun to watch. And Prince is the halftime show. Still, in the paraphrased words of Lewis Black, I'm a man and I have no religion, and it's on a Sunday, so I'm trying.

Indianapolis vs Chicago

Super Bowl XLI. The Big Game. Additional, generic football-related catchphrase. I just don't care. I don't care about Peyton Manning. I don't care about Tank Johnson. And I certainly don't care about Rex Grossman. I don't care about Thomas Jones, or Joseph Addai or even Marvin Harrison. I just don't care and you can't make me. I want this game to be good, I really do, but it won't be. It'll be an archetypal blase Super Bowl. The first quarter will start with both teams coming out flat, then ramping it up in the second quarter as we roll towards halftime and my second set of wings. One team will have clearly outplayed the other in the first half (for my money, this will be Indianapolis) but hold only a slim lead going into the locker rooms. Both teams will be stiff after the longer layoff going into the third quarter and the trailing team (thus, the Bears) will start to mount a comeback and tie the game going into the fourth quarter. Then the team which led in the first half will make a few costly errors early in the quarter allowing the supposedly beaten team to come back, score a touchdown or two and win going away with five minutes to go, leaving me in a beer and wing fed stupor and wishing I hadn't even watched.

As for actually breaking the game down, I believe the Bears will win for three distinct reasons.

1) Somehow, less pressure

2) Better defense

3) And I will stick to this until I am absolutely proven wrong, PEYTON MANNING IN A BIG GAME!!!!!

The Super Bowl is not Peyton's Place. He may not be Dan Fouts anymore, but, by God, he will be Dan Marino. He must never win the Super Bowl. I will be vindicated.

PREDICTION: Bears 24, Colts 15 (Yup, FIVE Vinatieri Field Goals.)

Sweet, Sweet Candy...Bam.

2007-02-01T10:08:00.000-05:00

Our long national nightmare is at an end. Food is safe for another television season. Marcel Vigneron has been defeated.

Let me say at the outset, for all my hatred of Marcel, he is technically a very good cook. And the stuff he is doing, while mostly cracked-out, is at the very least an homage to the avant-garde, if not itself avant-garde (more on this in a moment). But he is most certainly not a chef. I think the judges were all thinking about what might have been when they named Ilan the Top Chef last evening. When Sam told them he prepared Marcel's third dish of the evening, the producer's wonderment could barely be contained by the producers who wanted to capture some semblance of drama between the two contestants. Sam probably should have gotten to the final over Ilan, but it is my belief that the producers of the show, and Tom Colicchio (a man I continue to respect and admire, of course) thought Ilan and Marcel's battle royale would make better television.

In the end, Ilan cooked the meal of his life and Marcel screwed around with his chemistry set and simply failed. The judges wanted to give him the crown after the head shaving incident, but they simply could not on the weakness of his dishes last evening. They even put Wylie Dufresne, Marcel's culinary god and the beacon of hope to all so-called "molecular gastronomists" out in the world on the judges panel, and he was, at best, bemused my Marcel's vague attempts to be original. Soul beats toys every time in the kitchen. Last night's Top Chef proved it.

Al Gore, You Just Made The List

2007-01-26T12:24:00.000-05:00

For those of you in Boston, you know what I'm talking about. For those of you not in Boston, let me clue you in: It's FREAKING cold here!

In fact, it's so cold that it's warmer in Alaska and the North Pole (the North FREAKIN' Pole!) than in Boston. As I walked to the gym this morning (I am SO hardcore), the wind chill was minimal, but it still felt like it -15 degrees. It was so cold that my breath condensed and froze on my UCT scarf wraped around my face. It took me 15 minutes on the elliptical just to warm up. Speaking of UCT, today's Cape Town weather forecast calls for clear, sunny skies with a high of 86 degrees.

I hate everything. But especially that myth, global warming.

The Great Society, Redux

2007-01-25T12:42:00.000-05:00

Barack "SexyBack" Obama is out in front on one of the most important issues facing America today. Speaking at a FamiliesUSA conference this morning, the junior Senator from Illinois set the goal for his Presidency of getting the over 46 million uninsured citizens of the U.S. on the health care rolls by the time his first term in office comes to an end in 2013. Universal Health Care is the first step in providing for our citizens in this country. If we are the greatest, most powerful country in the world, then there is no reason at all why 46 million people should not have access to a doctor. Diseases which are eminently treatable instead become life-threatening because people are denied access to hospitals, and wait to long to receive treatment. It's simply wrong, and Senator Obama knows it, and that is why he has set this lofty goal, and that is why I congratulate him for his courage and his vision.

Furthermore, every other candidate in the race on the Democratic side should get behind this plan immediately. Let's not have the divisiveness and utter lack of policy maturation that we had in 2004. Let us, each of us, as Democrats pledge right here that whomever wins back the White House in 2008 for the party of the people, that it will be our unique undertaking to begin the process of making America better once again, and that we will start by providing health care to all of our citizens by 2013. It can be done. It should be done. Let us say, it must be done.

Wine and Sex. What More Do You Need?

2007-01-23T10:06:00.000-05:00

Great news from the scientific community this morning. A new study confirms what I (and, I'm sure, all the women I've ever met) already knew. Knowledge of wine makes you sexier.

Alder Yarrow at Vinography (which, if you like wine, and you're not reading his blog, then you are poorer for it) takes us through the particulars. The gist of it is that 2300 adults were surveyed and more than SEVEN in TEN respondents say wine knowledge contributes to making an attractive, possible mate look even more breathtaking.

So ladies, form an orderly queue...

Strength versus Strength

2007-01-21T08:36:00.000-05:00

It's Championship Sunday in the NFL, and we have been provided with two pretty amazing matchups to watch on the ol' big screen HD. In both games, emotion will be at peak levels and game play should be extraordinary as all four of today's teams have something prove and the desire and drive to get to Miami two weeks on. Let's break it down.

New Orleans at Chicago

The doubters, the haters and the prognosticators have all lined up on this one. And if you believe them, then the New Orleans Saints have already been crowned NFC champions. But this game is not, by any stretch of the imagination, going to be easy for America's Team. We all want it to be. We love the story: a city and a quarterback reborn, a showman and his coach taking it to the next level, the thought of the unmitigated shitshow that will ensue on Nourbon Street if New Orleans actually won a Championship. The hard facts are these:

1) The Bears defense has been slighted of late, but they are just that good. Losing Tommie Harris is a HUGE deal, because it means Urlacher has to do almost superhuman things against the pass. But Adewale Ogunleye and others should be able to stuff the Bush/McCallister run tandem and put the game on Brees' shoulders. Which leads me to...
2) Is Drew Brees the guy who can stand up and take on this vaunted Bears defense alone? Do we all really believe that he can put this team on his back and beat the Bears?
3) And this has been overlooked, I think, this week. It's friggin' cold in Chicago today. And it's snowing. This Saints team is an indoor team and we all know the stats on indoor teams in the playoffs.

Still, did you see the Bears game last week? They only beat Matt Hasselbeck and the Seahawks because they were handed the game in overtime. I have to believe that even with all the hype and consternation and uproar, the New Orleans Saints can overcome the odds and score an amazing victory for the Big Easy in the Windy City.

PREDICTION: Saints 27, Bears 21.

New England at Indianapolis

So, here we are. The Mother of All Battles. Peyton vs. Brady. Dungy vs. Belichick. Vinatieri vs. All of us. Let's face it, if Peyton Manning can't win this game, he will never, ever, EVER, win a Super Bowl with the Indianapolis Colts. It will be a track meet. He should have his choice of receivers open downfield in the depleted Patriot secondary. He should be able to find Dallas Clark all day in the flat. But he will have to rely on his arm. Belichick and his defensive scheme should be able to shut Joseph Addai down, or at least make him irrelevant as they did to Tomlinson last week. (Incidentally, I'm not going to take a shot at LT for his rather odd comments following last week's Patriot celebration. He's a professional and has proved that all season, so I'll chalk it up to a lapse in judgment and a tough loss. But please, LT, don't defend Merriman. He's everything you're not. He's a loser and a drug pusher and should never have been allowed to play in the NFL again. Don't forget also, we have been there before. We know how to act, thank you very much. Anyway, back to today's game.) That puts the game on Manning's shoulders and even though he will be at home instead of on the cold turf at the Razor, this is still the Patriots in the playoffs. We are in your head, Peyton Manning. All that aside, this one ought to be a nailbiter, as Belichick's plan probably calls for the same thing as last week, namely hanging in there and hope we have a chance with the ball with about four minutes left. It might not be "Adam and leave" anymore, but give me that situation and the New England Patriots will go back to the Super Bowl. If not, then, hey, I am about to become the biggest Saints fan you will ever meet.

PREDICTION: Patriots 30, Colts 29.

Last First Day Back

2007-01-18T14:56:00.000-05:00

So it's my last first day of school ever. Unless I go to grad school, but that ain't happening for a while, so let's chase this feeling. Many of you already know that I have a love-hate relationship with Tufts University. I love the people I've met here. My friends are so very important to me and they are all wonderful people. I hate the fact that I've met them here, however. There are officially no upshots left at Tufts University. Now, I even feel like an outsider moving through an alien world, which makes things even better. It was nice to go to my first class this morning and see Dubs on this side of the ocean, or to go to dinner last night with Jackie. And I do have Adam and Jon and Janna and The Gene and all the rest around here, but when I walk around campus those familiar faces I have become accustomed to seeing have all been replaced with younger, less interesting personages. I'm not even talking about my friends here, I'm talking about "those people." You know what I mean: those characters who have developed in our collective minds since freshman year. Urban Sombrero Guy. Black Power Man. That Crazy Chick from the Gym. They're all gone, but I still remain, walking through this alien world I used to call home. And so, here I am. One more art history class today and then a weekend. All the while continuing to feel that I just don't belong anymore.

Another Sunday, Another Chance for Me to Look Ridiculous

2007-01-12T15:02:00.000-05:00

The Divisional Playoff Round is upon us, and marquee matchups abound this weekend. I'd love to tell you about themes to watch for across the four-game slate, but I really can't tie any of these games together. So, let's just get to the matchups.

Indianapolis at Baltimore

Strength versus strength in the Charm City this weekend as the prolific Colts offense take on the smothering defense of the Ravens. The front seven led by Ray Lewis will crush Joseph Addai and the Pro Bowl-calibre led by Ed Reid for the Ravens should have enough to stop another Peyton Manning barrage through the air. So basically, if Steve McNair shows up and puts his pads on, the Ravens ought to win this game going away as the Colts defense will have no answer for the 1-2 punch of Jamal Lewis and Air McNair.

PREDICTION: Ravens 12, Colts 3.

Philadelphia at New Orleans

Who 'Dey Gon' Beat 'Dem Saints? Well, it's entirely possible it'll be the high-flying Philadelphia Eagles, who did just enough to beat the Giants at home last weekend. Still, Saturday will be the first home playoff game for the Saints in more than ten years and a team that has been mired in futility for decades finally has a legitimate shot at the Super Bowl. It's an opportunity that I, for one, do not see them wasting. From a football standpoint, Brees, Bush, McAllister and Colston should be too much for a depleted Eagle defense to handle, and it seems as if Jeff Garcia's clock may have struck midnight.

PREDICTION: Saints 34, Eagles 28.

Seattle at Chicago

If ever a powerful number one seed could fall at home in their first playoff game, it could be the Chicago Bears. The Seahawks escaped with a win last weekend after the Tony Romo gaffe which you have no doubt 38,451 times on SportsCenter this week, and that team should be a two touchdown underdog to the incredible Bears defense. However, which Rex Grossman will we see on Sunday? Will it be the game manager who led Chicago to some great early season triumphs, or will it be the checked-out clock watcher, the man who admitted to not adequately preparing for his New Year's Eve matchup with Green Bay? Either way, Chicago is in trouble with Rex Grossman at quarterback, but that trouble may not be enough to stop them from advancing to a home date with the Saints in the NFC Championship.

PREDICTION: Bears 17, Seattle 13.

New England at San Diego

Here are some key things to remember going into this weekend's best game:

1a) Tom Brady is the best playoff and clutch quarterback since Joe Montana.
1b) Philip Rivers will make his first NFL playoff start on Sunday afternoon.

2a) Bill Belichick is the best coach in the NFL.
2b) Marty Schottenheimer is 5-12 in the playoffs. He has not won a game since 1993.

3) San Di-aah-go was settled by the Germans in 1903. And they named it, "A Whale's Vagina."

The Chargers still have LaDainian Tomlinson who should be able to run roughshod all over the Patriots defensive corps. But it is hard to discount Brady, Belichick and knowing how to win, especially after the pounding the gave Man-genius and the Jets last weekend.

PREDICTION: Patriots 31, Chargers 28.

Tom Colicchio: On Point

2007-01-11T08:43:00.000-05:00

Chef Colicchio's blog this morning was definitely on the mark about the shortcomings of last night's Top Chef. Echoing his thoughts, it was apparent in watching last night's abortion of a challenge that neither team was prepared enough to tackle it. The very same challenge was given in Season 1 with much better, if still not perfect, results. (However, and I could be wrong about this, but I'm fairly sure the contestants last season had more prep time with their spare space.) Last night's crew was, as Colicchio says, unimaginative, seeking only to do just enough to get by. Honestly, I think if Colicchio had his way he would fired about 4 competitors. Michael, unfortunately, did deserve to go home at this point. Sam's exasperation at having to carry him was becoming distracting in the kitchen. And with Ilan having to handle more than cooking last night - which he still didn't execute very well - Sam had to exercise his talents at an almost superhuman level. On the other team, the Diner concept just didn't work. They didn't, as Gail Simmons said, take it far enough. Undercooked chicken wings, meatloafy burgers and whatever that Oreo-Lemon thing was are just not what the judges are looking for this late in the competition. No one took the reigns on that team and really ran with the Diner idea. On the flip side, like Sam's questionable dessert or Cliff's decision to tackle the front of he house, at least it was a risk, even if it did not play out the way they had hoped. In the end, the challenge was difficult but not impossible and each of the competitors could have, and should have done better.

Oh, and one more thing. Marcel freestyling about how he has no friends in the beginning of the episode was PRICELESS. That is most assuredly going to receive "Save Until I Delete" (® Bill Simmons) status on the ol' TiVo. I mean, did you really think he went home at night and wondered why no one is friends with me? I didn't, but apparently, he did. Little tip, Marcel: Writing bad "raps" about how no one likes you is a surefire way to make sure you live a lonely life. Still, it was about a 15 on the unintentional comedy scale (® Bill Simmons).

New Jersey Eyed As Source of New York Stench

2007-01-09T09:56:00.000-05:00

An actual headline. And truer words may never have been spoken. Here's the story:

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20070109/ap_on_re_us/nyc_gas_odor

According to the AP lede, the stench seemed to be coming from somewhere near Seacaucus. I think the Jets were meeting near there for a little post-thumping wrapup yesterday...

BA-ZING!

Seriously, with headlines like that, you have to wonder if Christmas really only does come but once a year.

In other stench related news, I'd like to wish a happy and healthy 23rd birthday to our dear friend, James Paul Turco. May his birthday be filled with ribs and beer. Maybe some chicken.

The Atrocity in Arizona

2007-01-09T00:08:00.000-05:00

Florida won tonight's game (though, we may have to adopt the Bill Simmons-esque idea that this game just didn't actually take place) for a few specific reasons:

1) Ted Ginn, Jr.

The explosive deep threat was nowhere to be found after spraining his foot on literally the first play from scrimmage that did not involve him racing 93 yards to paydirt. Troy Smith looked absolutely lost after that.

2) Troy Smith

The Heisman Trophy winner's final line tells the whole story - 4/14, 35 yards passing; 10 rushes, -29 yards on the ground. That's NEGATIVE 29 yards. Again, these people expected to be national champions at the end of the night.

3) Urban Meyer

I hate to say it but Jim Tressel, possibly for the first time in his career, was outcoached. It's that simple. Meyer prepared his guys better, understood the plan of attack better and went for the jugular better than Tressel did. For that, Meyer deserves all the praise the media will be lobbing at him for the next few weeks. Tressel had a bad night. We all do. His just came at the worst possible time.

4) The 51-Day Layoff

The last time the Buckeyes suited up, they were playing Michigan at The Horseshoe in the biggest game of the college football year. That was almost an eternity ago. The layoff left them rusty and ill-prepared for the Florida onslaught.

5) The Lack of a Playoff System

Because USC, Boise State, Michigan, LSU, Notre Dame or Wisconsin would have whipped these Gators given the chance. There. I said it.

O-H-I-O

2007-01-08T15:46:00.000-05:00

So, take it for what it's worth after my woeful NFL prjections this weekend (though, I did still manage to pick three out of the four winners), but in just a few hours the Ohio State Buckeyes will impore to 13-0 and be crowned National Champions. Now, I could, and probably should, go on some long-winded rant here about the fact that though I believe the Buckeyes thoroughly deserve that honor and title, the entire system is flawed because there's no playoff system in college football. But enough ink has been spilled over this issue already. So add my voice to those (read: every single sports commentator or fan in America) who believe in the need for a playoff system. That said, the system we do have has given us a thoroughly uninteresting game which the Buckeyes will win. The SEC and the Florida Gators just do not provide adequate competition for a team the calibre of the Buckeyes and Troy Smith. The Gators actually backed into the Tostitos National Championship Game (presented by Tostitos), according to most commentators, because they played two more games after OSU-Michigan (a game which will most likely be remembered as the REAL national championship for this season, despite the Wolverines' anemic Rose Bowl performance) and USC tripped up against UCLA. Find me one person interested in seeing Florida tonight and I will find you ten people who think USC should be involved and about a hundred more who think there ought to be a rematch of "The Game."

Don't get me wrong, Urban Meyer is a good coach and UF is a storied program, but you can't sit there and make me believe that they are the second best team in America right now. It has to be USC. Or Michigan. I could make a case for Boise State after that Fiesta Bowl for crying out loud. Still, I will watch tonight in glorious HDTV as the Buckeyes stomp to victory as once again a Big Ten program with football players on it beats up an SEC "team" with showmen and charlatans masquerading as football players.

PREDICTION: Ohio State 47, Florida 24.

The Panoply of Playoff Prognostications!

2007-01-05T14:28:00.000-05:00

The NFL Playoffs are here and what a time to be alive if you're a fan of wild, unpredictable football. This year's incarnation of the National Football League has been harder to follow than a Tarantino flick with more ups and downs than Season 2 of "24." Nothing is scared this season. And no one is incredibly sure what's going to go down on any given Sunday (or, thanks to FlexSchedule, alternate Satudays as well). So, here are some things we know with absolute certainty going into Wild Card Weekend:

1) LaDainian Tomlinson is good.
2) Rex Grossman is bad.

That is all.

With all that in mind, here are some picks for this weekend's games, which I'm sure will ook really stupid by Monday morning.

Dallas at Seattle

The NFC is bad enough that two teams that would lose to Boise State, given the opportunity, have to fight it out in round one of the playoffs. Here's the kicker: One of these teams, by rule, has to win and advance. The Cowboys defense is non-existent. Apart from DeMarcus Ware, they may actually be playing with paraplegic children at the other 10 positions. Add that to the fact that the NFL figured out Tony Romo about six weeks ago and Terrell Owens couldn't care less about catching the football, and you should have a recipe for disaster. However, Seattle is not much better. The injured and ill-educated Matt Hasselbeck (okay, that's not fair, but he did go to my rival high school, so maybe someday he'll get an education) has looked shaky for the better part of this season with Shaun Alexander unable to pick up the slack. Despite a standout performance from Deion Branch (why can't we get players like that), the Seahawks have underperformed from their near-glorious run last year to Super Bowl XL. Still, at home, in front of the literally tens of football fans in Seattle, they should have enough to beat back the Cowboys.

PREDICTION: Seattle 17, Dallas 6

Kansas City at Indianapolis

With the Bengals and Broncos packing their things and heading home for the long off-season, the Kansas City Chiefs were able to hang on and back in (Sorry, Herm Edwards, you guys did back into the playoffs) to the AFC #6 seed. This game presents a lot of "if's" for the Chiefs, but ones that they may be able to capitalize on and win. The biggest "If" is Larry Johnson. If he's not a beaten up sack of his former self heading into this week, he should be able to run roughshod all over the Colts "run defense" and perhaps even get his name in the record books for single game performances. The Colts, of course, are second only to Dallas when it comes to a complete, uncaring lack of any sort of defensive prowess. It's surprising enough that Tony Dungy, a man who has been widely revered in NFL circles for defensive know-how, has let such a vital part of the NFL success equation run amok under his control, but the fact that no one in the organization seems to care is shocking. They are content to try and win games in track meet form, with Peyton "Hayseed" Manning lobbing bombs to Marvin Harrison 15-16 times a game and winning 45-41. But one dimensional teams, especially ones where the quarterback is a headcase in the playoffs, do not win the Super Bowl. Their counterparts, the Chiefs, know this and will, as Coach Edwards likes to enunciate, "play to WIN the GAME." Solid Chiefs pass defense should eb enough to contain Manning and Harrison at home, and force more pressure on to the shoulders of the rookie standout Joseph Addai. I have a hard time picking against the Colts at home in the playoffs, where they should be able to play "their game" the way they have for the last five years. But I'm doing it anyway.

PREDICTION: Chiefs 31, Colts 28

New York at New England

Okay, let's just cut through the hype for a moment, shall we? I want to say this loudly and clearly enough so that you all understand. The New York Jets are the worst 10-6 team in NFL history, there I said it. They had one of the easiest down-the-stretch schedules of any team in the league. Their quarterback has been playing over his head for weeks. And they do not have a solid running game, even if Leon Washington is the second coming of Terrell Davis circa 1998, like everyone in New York seems to think. Here's the straight dope: The Patriots have their own problems, and let me assure you, not having Rodney Harrison this week is a bigger blow than some might think. Tom Brady has no one to throw to - I mean, honestly, the fact that the game's premier passer is throwing to Jabar Gaffney is outrageous. And Dillon and Maroney are both banged up. All that said, there are two very vital pieces of information to keep in mind:

1) The Patriots are playing at home, where they have not lost a playoff game in the Tom Brady era (And yes, he gets his own era now. Not just as a reference point but as a sense of meaning for the league).
2) I don't care how good a team you are, you do not beat Bill Belichick twice in one season. He is the NFL equivalent of Jack Bauer. He will end you and all your hopes and dreams. And he always wins.

PREDICTION: Patriots 34, Jets 14

New York at Philadelphia

Excuse me, you there, Philadelphia quarterback - who are you and what have you done with the real Jeff Garcia? This guy is playing so well Donovan McNabb's mother is getting press because she's afraid Donovan might have to fight for his job next year. And that family just can't get by on Chunky Soup money. But seriously, Garcia is out of his mind. He, and Andy Reid (who, if not for Sean Payton, really should be coach of the year), have engineered one of the great second half comebacks in NFL history. And in an NFC where nothing is certain, they might just have what it takes to get back to the Super Bowl. The Giants, on the other hand, do not. They have one overpowering weapon, Tiki Barber, who i snow playing for his legacy, but that's just not going to be enough. Eli Manning needs to show better develpoment next season than this season if he's going to be the star passer everyone thinks he ought to be. But he's about to have a long offsesaon to think about it.

PREDICTION: Eagles 27, Giants 13

Check back Monday for a breakdown of the Tostitos OSU-Florida BCS Tostitos National Championship Game (Presented by Tostitos)

Since Last We Spoke

2007-01-04T16:30:00.000-05:00

Welcome to Theory in Practice - 2007 Edition. I've spent the holidays relaxing and hope you have as well. But so much has happened during my repose that we need to keep it light and fresh this evening. Here's the rundown:

Boise State 43, Oklahoma 42

For those of you who did not take in the Tostitos Fiesta Bowl (presented by Tostitos), you should immediately stop reading this message, go into iTunes, download the game and watch it in full. I'll wait.

::waiting::

There. Wasn't that amazing? But seriously, Boise State, a team that plays in a joke of a conference (the wickety-wickety-WAC), on a field dubbed "Smurf Turf" (it's blue...and no one's incredibly sure why), and in Idaho (America's unknown wasteland) ran, passed and kicked ass against the Sooners, one of college football's oldest and most storied programs. And they did it the old-fashioned way: With a statue of liberty play capped off by the running back proposing to his girlfriend on the sideline. I mean, you can't make this stuff up. In any case, it was a hell of a game. Watching it down on the farm, I had the sense by the second quarter that I was watching something special. Games like that one don't come along, but when they do, they exemplify the essence of sport. That on any given day, any team can summon the strength of will and desire to reign victorious, riding off into the sunset, new wives in hand, sponsored by Tostitos.

Pat Robertson: "The Lord is Coming and Boy is He Pissed!"

I had the great good fortune to catch this little chestnut on the 700 Club, one of my favorite television debacles...I mean, programs...meant to be the marching orders each day for the evangelical Christian community in America. The show's fuhrer...I mean, host...Pat Robertson, in his New Year show decided to let us viewers in on his prayer meeting with God. The meeting took place in Virginia Beach (apparently, God likes to dine at Shoney's) just in the last week and Robertson was advised the Lord that great devastation lies ahead for America in 2007. Robertson actually said, "I won't say it's nuclear in nature, I'm not quite sure I understood, but watch out after about September." Thanks Pat, also, next time you have a fearmongering tete-a-tete with the Almighty, could you make sure you get your hearing aid turned up? That'd be great.

The NFL Playoff Picture

Last weekend provided us with some of those great days in the football year, the day when Chris Berman and those of his ilk bust out the Excel spreadsheet their production assistants spent all last night poring over while downing Chinese food by the quart in order to explain to us just how, at 7-9, the Atlanta Falcons still had an outside shot of making the playoffs. I swear there were playoff scenarios that read like this:
The Kansas City Chiefs can clinch a playoff spot with a win AND losses by the Jets, Broncos, Bengals, Jaguars and Colts OR a Bills win or tie OR a Falcons loss by more than 17 points AND Jim Mora, Jr. makes less than 4 comments about wanting to coach the Redskins BUT ONLY IF those comments are broadcast on ESPN Radio in Omaha between 6-9am on Sunday.
By the way, the Chiefs take on the Colts this Saturday night, so I guess that all happened.

Nick Saban: "Remember When I Said I'd Never Coach in Alabama? I Misspoke."

The erstwhile Miami Dolphins coach spent most of the last two months reigning in speculation about his taking the job in Tuscaloosa and becoming the coach of the Crimson Tide. Last week, he went so far as to say, "I am not going to be the coach at Alabama." These comments are now in stark contrast to his news conference held today when he was welcomed as the new coach of the Alabama Crimson Tide. Apparently what happened is that he turned down the job a couple weeks ago, then Alabama said they'd pay him almost $4mln per year. To which he replied, "Ah, crafty move, Alabama" and quickly signed on the dotted line. I mean, he's a terrible NFL coach, he's just better suited to the college game, but the entire city of Miami must feel like they got screwed with their pants on. It takes real balls to be Nick Saban. He's a halfway decent coach who goes city to city every three years, extorts a stupid amount of money, pledges he will never leave and then pulls up stakes to move to another high-profile job where he makes more money and amasses a team that wins about 9 games.

I, Deval L. Patrick, Do Solemnly Swear...

For the first time in sixteen years, the sun came out in January, and with pride and purpose a Democrat stepped into the Corner Office as Governor of Massachusetts. Thousands gathered along Beacon Street this morning as Deval Patrick, born on the mean streets of Chicago, educated at Milton and Harvard and whose personal convictions have been built by the fires of race in America, took the Oath of Office as the Commonwealth's 71st Governor. In the middle of a city that has been a flashpoint for racial tensions throughout nearly its entire history, a Black man and an outsider spoke to the gathered crowd of a new hope for Massachusetts as its governor. And so, as 2007 takes shape, both in the Bay State and, as now Speaker Pelosi takes over in Washington, hope reigns in politics in America. One hopes it will last.

Gerald Ford Dead Today, At The Age of 93...

2006-12-27T13:07:00.000-05:00

Not to besmirch the memory of the now late President Ford, but I am reminded on this occasion of one of the greatest sketches in SNL history. And thanks to Google Video, here it is:

Hilarious.

"Surgical Snakebots Crawl Down Your Throat" and Other Idiotic Things I Deal With at the Office on an Hourly Basis (Also, Happy Holidays!)

2006-12-21T15:28:00.000-05:00

The title of this entry was overheard just minutes ago from a co-worker, who shall remain nameless. It's our holiday festival today here on the 3rd Floor of Ballou Hall, so you can imagine how much we're working. Anyway, I'm taking this opportunity to wish you all a happy and healthy holiday season. Whether you celebrate Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, Festivus, Boxing Day or anything else, I certainly hope you pass the time with ease surrounded by those you love. I'll be watching 24 pretty much non-stop (it's a new obsession) on the 42-inch HDTV in my new apartment. Despite the fact that I'll be in Medford, I'll be in hog heaven, no doubt.

In any case, best wishes of the season to all of you. See you back here after the break for more insane ravings.

Wolf Blitzer and the Art of the Smackdown

2006-12-15T07:31:00.000-05:00

CNN and YouTube have combined forces to give us an early gift this holiday season. For some reason which defies almost all logic, Wolf Blitzer decided to interview none other than David Duke, the maniacal former Grand Wizard of the Ku Klux Klan (though, as you will see, that appellation causes Duke to bristle ever so slightly) and Louisiana State Senator and Gubernatorial Candidate. Even better than that interview would be under normal circumstances, Duke was, at the time of the interview, in Tehran, attending a conference of Holocaust deniers convened by the always stayed and composed Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmedinejad. It appears Duke and Ahmedinejad have become BFF's over their collective hatred of "Zionist Oppressors" and "Israel's control over the U.S. government."

Blitzer is nearly incredulous to the point of disbelief with Duke, introducing him by asking the question "So, don't you just basically hate Jews?" And, as amazing as it will sound, it only gets better from there.

But don't let me spoil the fun, watch the interview in its entirety here.

Remember, Blitzer's an avowed GOP coordinator, so I'm not usually a big fan, but he showed that assclown bigot Duke where to shove his phony, ridiculous spewings.

Marcel Vigneron, I Detest You

2006-12-13T23:31:00.000-05:00

"I really couldn't do that without a thermal immersion circulator."

"I really felt I didn't need the leadership and kind of did my own thing."

"I engage in avant-garde molecular gastronomy."

"Are you familiar with the plantain? Ok, great."

Ok, so that last one was Stephen Asprinio from last season's Top Chef, but the rest are from that ridiculous pile of bad hair and worse cooking skills who makes my life miserable every Wednesday night at 10pm (9 Central). Marcel needs to be stopped. If he were a decent chef, I might even give him a pass, but he is a kitsch artist passing himself off as gourmet with very few skills, less personality and an absolutely heroic ability to be inarticulate and almost sublimely retarded in the kitchen. The culinary abortions, to borrow a phrase from Stewart Gilligan Griffin, which he assembles (I will NEVER say "creates") are as lackadaisical as they are disgusting. I'm sorry, cutting a slice of watermelon in a circle does not entitle you to call it a "steak." It's not creative, it's a cheap cop-out. People like Cliff, Elia (despite the fact that she was sorely lacking in the leadership department tonight), Sam and Ilan are far and away better chefs for the simple reason that they are more willing to adapt their creations in the chase for the best taste then the best looks. I have a hard time believing any of those people would ever complain about the lack of a thermal immersion circulator. Marcel falls victim to the very same notion which damns Bobby Flay: Just because you press elements of food into a ring and then hit it with some squeeze bottle full of some crap sauce you "invented" doesn't make the product haute cuisine. People like Marcel are killing the restaurant industry, there I said it. No one who actually cares about food wants to eat Turkey Roulade that's been dumbed down to the point of tastelessness, completely lacking in any measure of soul, in order to be chic. Only people who care about being trendy go in for that crap. To be avant garde is necessary, of course, expanding boundaries is necessary in any pursuit, food included. Just don't act like what you're doing is so terribly important to the point where you begin to think your food is actually good, okay Marcel?

P.S. Mia did the right thing tonight. The judges (for some ungodly reason), I believe, were actually going to send Elia home. While her leadership skills are questionable, especially after the complete disaster that tonight's challenge became for her team, Mia allowed herself to twist in the wind. She didn't, as Chef Colicchio pointed out, speak up for herself enough, and so she must reap what she has sown. Classy move, though, the leaving thing.

Monday Evening Quarterback

2006-12-11T20:14:00.000-05:00

As America settles in for another rousing edition of Monday Night Football, let's take a look at what we learned yesterday across the NFL.

1) The Patriots cannot play in Miami in December.

Okay, well, we already knew that, given that in the entire 41-year history of the franchise, the Boys in Blue are now 2-12 in that situation. Some of the worst, stomach-punch, gut-wrenching losses in Pats history have come at the hands of the Fish, and yesterday was no different. Tom Brady looked human as Jason Taylor (who, by the way, in my admittedly limited NFL viewing this season, has gone to the next level and is rivaling Urlacher for Defensive Player of the Year) and company humbled the two-time Super Bowl MVP. I'm not as concerned as many commentators have been about the three turnovers. Yesterday was a punting situation for the Pats. They barely suited up. Luckily, they have the week off next Sunday (at home to the Texans, who are suppsedly still an NFL franchise...more on them in a moment), so they rest a bit, heal up and secure their rightful place in the playoffs.

2) The Saints and Chargers are actually that good.

If Tom Brady looked human, Drew Brees and LaDainian Tomlinson looked superhuman. Brees, with a big up to prospective Coach of the Year Sean Payton, used all his weapons effectively and the Saints marched to victory easily over Dallas who, suddenly, look eminently beatable. For all of the stories about how great the Saints are for New Orleans (and believe me, every one of those stories deserves to be written), this is more than a Cinderella story. This team can compete, and they will be in the mix in the NFC. But what more can be said about Tomlinson, except that I think we all hope he is indicative of the next wave of NFL superstars. In an age dominated by distractions like T.O., Tomlinson is the consummate professional and the one guy around whom you want to start building your tam and your locker room. Chris Berman made the point on SportsCenter this evening, when Tomlinson shattered Shaun Alexander's barely-minted touchdown record, he spoke about how "we" would be telling "our" kids about this feat. That's not the royal we, man. Tomlinson immediately credited his offensive line and his quarterback and his coaching staff for a decidedly singular achievement. I'm honestly surprised he didn't thank the waterboy for keeping him hydrated so effectively. In any case, Tomlinson's performance over the last 9 weeks (26 touchdowns...you read that correctly) is an astonishing moment for pro football and sports in general, and should be commended by every dan with a voice and sportswriter with a pen.

3) Houston, we have a problem.

Vince Young, Reggie Bush and Matt Leinart are all going to be outstanding professionals. And the Houston Texans passed on all of them. This joke of a franchise went with a defensive end from NC State (a bad team in a lacklustre conference) because they thought they were building for the future with David Carr and Dominick Davis. Newsflash, Houston: Any of those three would have been, not just an upgrade, but the answer to all of your problems. Making matters worse, Vince Young, the local lad the Texans snubbed in order to bulk up their defense, ran right through that defense in overtime, 38 yards to paydirt to sink the Texans. Talk about a dagger.

Now, for what we should learn tonight.

1) Rex Grossman will bounce back.

I mean, he has to. You don't post a 1.3 Passer Rating and then get worse the following week. That can't happen.
...Right?

2) The Rams will make a valiant a ttempt to prove their detractors wrong.

But they are team going in exactly the wrong direction with bad coaching and a worse quarterback, so they will fail. But, at least they will try.

3) Theismann will continue to step on Kornheiser's brilliant insights.

I'm pretty sure the only person who misses Paul McGuire in the commentary box in all of America is Joe Theismann.

Enjoy the game.

Scott Boras Must Be Stopped

2006-12-08T09:49:00.000-05:00

Let us start the proceedings on this new blog with a treatise on the merits of banishing Scott Boras from our beloved game of baseball. Pete Rose was banned for life for less egregious crimes than Boras commits on a daily basis. So, Bud Selig, I beg you to weigh the merits of forcing Boras' graceful exit.
First and foremost, Boras, through an avowedly shrewd series of maneuvers has, over the last several years, managed to trap in his thrall some of the most important and sought-after players in the game today. That's the business of baseball, and Boras has been very good at capitalizing on it. The problem is, he has become so powerful that he now controls ALL of the game's greatest superstars. He now has a monopoly on the marketplace. Just in this year's free agent class, he controls the destiny of Daisuke Matsuzaka (a name we will return to in mere moments) and Barry Zito, as well as the recently signed Greg Maddux and J.D. Drew among a host of others. For the latter two he has secured ridiculous contracts (though I do not begrudge Maddux for getting a well-deserved payday despite the fact he has been over the hill for about three years now). Because he is in complete control of the market, Boras was able to bend the Red Sox (a team who now have 4 frontline, capable of starting outfielders for three positions) over a barrel and give J.D. Drew a 5-year, $70 million contract. Don't get me wrong Drew is a very capable 5-hitter with a good glove, but he is injury-prone (averages about 115 games a season) and no one is quite sure how he will handle the immense pressure of playing in baseball's holiest city. Nonetheless, because Boras controls nearly every other commodity that the Red Sox would desire at that position, he was able to sidle up to Theo and the Trio and name his price.
Which brings us to the Matsuzaka conundrum. The Red Sox have ponied up $51.1 million just to TALK to the Japanese supposed-superstar-to-be and now Boras isn't playing nice. He has repeatedly leaked stories to the media (along with the Godfather, Don Larry Lucchino) about how far apart the two sides are, trying to build a wave of public sentiment in Boston that will force Epstein and Lucchino's hand and pay frontline starter prices for unproven talent. Topping that of course, he is also leaking stories all over ESPN about how Texas is preparing to offer Barry Zito an unconscionable $105 million over six years and that Matsuzaka's talent far exceeds that of Zito. Boras, thus, is creating an artificial marketplace. What he is doing is tantamount to insider trading. Agents should be allowed to get the best deals for their clients, but what Boras is doing is forcing the Kansas City Royals, for example, to shell out $55 million over five years to secure the services of Gil "Ga" Meche, or the Cubs to give Ted Lilly $40 million over four years. Ted Lilly can't pitch his way out of a wet paper bag, let alone even stand up to National League competition. But, again, because of Boras' control of the market and underhanded tactics used to exploit it, this is the situation in which we find ourselves. How much longer until we return to the bloated, never-ending contracts of the A-Rod and Manny era? How much longer until Ian Bladergroen, one of Boras' prospect holdings is holding out from contract talks until a team offers him 7 years and $148 million to be a 6-hitter with a .280 average?
So the question remains, how does baseball stop Boras? The answer is rather simple in theory yet extremely complicated in practice. (See what I did there...it's the name of the blog...Oh, never mind.) The 30 General Managers must (including Brian Cashman) resolve in the next off-season to stop negotiating with this terror. Next year's free agent class is much deeper than this year's and you can bet that Boras will be lining up his talent pool at the winter meetings for a dog and pony show about how you too can secure the services of Chan Ho Park for 5 years for a scant $189 million or some ridiculous thing. No, the GMs must take a stand and force Boras' clients into a semi-holdout predicament. These guys are not that stupid. If they are told repeatedly that they will not play if they represented by a blackballed entity, they'll jump ship quickly, diversify the agent pool and the market again and reset the marketplace to be much more fair and equitable. Then Boras, millions in hand, can retire to a life of ignominy.
It'll never happen, of course. But boy would I love to see the stupid look on his face if it did.

Welcome to Theory in Practice

2006-12-04T13:05:00.000-05:00

For those of you who just clicked over from the Pink Polo Goes to Africa, welcome! For those who didn't, how the hell did you find me? Anyway, this space will start to fill up very soon with musings on diverse subjects of national and world import. You know, baseball, wine, music, politics, being a college student. Real important stuff.
Anyway, thanks for looking in. Check back soon!